OPTIONAL TASK 133
2 Years Ago.... February 3rd
The words played over and over in Bowie’s head. “Ryan is missing in action, we can only assume he’s dead. I’m really sorry for your loss. If you need anything don’t hesitate to contact us” the marine officer said to her before leaving. He entered her life and ruined it within a split second. Her entire world had been flipped upside down. The love of her life, her high school sweetheart was gone and wasn’t coming back. The grief surged with every expelled breath, always reaching higher peaks, never sufficiently soothed by her long intakes of the damp spring air. Tears began to spill from her helpless eyes onto the rug beneath her feet. It was hard to accept what she had been told. “He promised me he would come home, he said nothing would tear us apart” she said to the silent abyss around her. It felt as though he had told her a million lies, and hadn’t kept a promise. Her heart hurt, it felt like it had been smashed into a million tiny pieces.
Looking around the living room she saw the pictures of the two of them scattered around. Picking up the gold frame she looked at the photo behind the glass. It was when he proposed to her. It had been a beautiful night, one of the greatest moments in her life, and now she felt like she would never have a happy life again. She threw the frame against the wall and the glass smashed over the wooden floor, the shards of glass resembled her heart. Baxter hid in the corner, looking scared. Bowie was in a state of despair, and shock. What was she supposed to do now? Looking around the home it no longer felt like home. It was supposed to be their home, a place for the two of them to be happy together but that was not meant to be anymore.
After a few days she went to the realtor and put the house up for sale before buying another home in Mountain Falls. She was starting over, all over again. It was hard to settle in. As she moved around it didn’t feel like a home yet. She still had Baxter though, he was the only constant in her life. He hadn’t left her side. Eventually the house felt like a home, but the pain she felt was still as strong as ever. It was a pain that just wouldn’t leave her. She missed Ryan every single day, and hoped that he would walk through the door, but deep down she knew it wouldn’t happen.
Holding a funeral ceremony for him without a body was peculiar, but she felt somewhat pressured into doing it. Her friends kept telling her it would help her move on… it hadn’t. She scattered his ashes in his favourite place, which was difficult. She was sure her body would run out of water from the amount of tears that had fallen from her eyes. Scattering the ashes didn’t mean she would forget, or that she had moved on. There was no time frame for grieving.
Two years on and the house has changed a little. A lot of redecorating had taken place and it really felt like home now. Her depression and anxiety was always up and down, and she struggled to deal with it. Despite living with her sister now, she still felt lonely. There was a gap in her heart that would never be truly filled, because Bowie would never forget her first love.