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OPTIONAL TASK 138
"Don't do this right now” came a voice from the other side of her bedroom door. It was her concerned partner Ryan who had come to check on her after receiving a distressing voice mail from her. She knew he would be at work and left him a voice mail that said ‘I can’t go on, this pain is too much. I will always love you Ryan, but I just can’t do this anymore. Don’t come over, just tell the police and paramedics to come to my home’. Her voice croaky from crying. Now he was at her door trying to prevent her from doing something terrible, that she would not be able to take back. Bowie sat with her back pressed against the locked door, sitting rigid as she stared at the pill bottles, alcohol bottles and the razor blade placed on the floor in front of her. She had recently lost her parents, and the pain was all too much for her. An emptiness filled her heart, the numbness pounding in her brain, and the salt tears flowed unchecked from her eyes were all signs of her grief. A shear nothingness now took hold of her soul and was beginning to engulf her entirely. The grief was eating her up and trying to destroy her.
Her blue hues stared at the razor in front of her. The metallic silver glistened under the sunlight that was streaming in from the window. It was sharp. It could effortlessly cut through the soft flesh of her wrists, and she was sure if she pressed hard enough she could sever and artery or two. She wasn’t sure what her method would be. Maybe swallow the pills down with alcohol and then cut her wrists, maybe that would be the devastating combination she was after. The depressive thoughts in her head were swirling around and tormenting her. She just wanted the pain to go away and in the melancholia state she was in, she believed the only way to escape the pain was to be dead. Being dead would mean she would be with her parents and would not have to face the cruel world alone. Although she had Ryan and her friends she still felt so alone. She felt like she had nothing else to live for, so what was the point in living.
“Come on Bowie, please don’t do this” Ryan said, his voice briefly pulling her away from her thoughts. “I know you are hurting right now, but please don’t do this. I love you. You can get through this Bow, I will help you through this. I love you. Please, just open the door” he said. She could hear the sorrowfulness in his tone, which made her feel bad. She could tell she was hurting him, but she still felt like she had to do this. “No” she softly responded, and moved away from the door dragging the items with her. “Bowie, please” Ryan called out to her. He looked through the small gap in the keyhole and could see she had moved away from the door. With a couple of hard kicks the door swung off its hinges allowing him into the room. He rushed over to her and embraced her in a hug. Bowie tried to push him off but his grip was too tight. “I’m not going to let you hurt yourself. I can’t lose you Bowie, I love you” he said.
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