Four™

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Gender: Male
Age: 39
Sign: Virgo
Country: United States

Signup Date:
July 04, 2015

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07/28/2016 05:42 PM 

What do you want!!!

Sometimes I just felt like running. Leaving everything behind me and running so fast that the whole world turned into a blur! I wondered if it would take away the moments where you were left with just your own thoughts. If you'd have to listen to your mind, or even hear it above the pounding of your heart; and the ragging hiss of your breathing as you gasped for air.

Everyone wanted something. I was sure of that. My Mother, she wanted freedom and had constantly stolen moments. She'd close her eyes and let her mind wander far and free away from the confines of the Abnigation compound. I'd watch her staring into the distance as she did the dishes or sneaking out through the back door late at night.

My Father, he wanted control! To look perfect in the eyes of his Faction. So much so, he took great liberty's to hide what he classified as flaws. I'd never needed to be told that I was one of those flaws. He reminded me every day in some way or another. I'd learned to be grateful when he'd banish me upstairs the moment he thought we'd have company. Anything was better then the beatings.

 photo Untitled-7_zpswh8dvat5.gif



I could hear their footsteps pounding the pavement behind me. Their breathing, shallow and fast. I picked up the pace. If I could outrun them, outrun this world then maybe I wouldn't have to think!

Erudite, they wanted control. Control of the whole city and all the other Factions. They were planning a war against Abnigation. I was sure of that. I'd got all the information I needed from Max's computer. Sometimes it paid to work in surveillance.
Max? What did he want? My best guess was self preservation! Maybe Jeanine had promised him a place at her side once she had the whole city under her control. He was getting older and his days as a Leader of Dauntless were numbered. A few years, He'd find himself Factionless. Alone amongst the people he despised. It was obvious he'd be too coward to face the chasm from the way he let Jeanine manipulate him, 

Eric! He wanted power! He only felt in control when he was looking down on people. Taking pleasure in the cruelty he inflicted upon them, or watching them flinch in anticipation of it. 
He reminded me a lot of my Father, just he never bothered to hide his cruel side. Instead he relished in it believing it made him stronger. More Dauntless!

Up ahead I could see the Dauntless Guards gathered, forming a border of sorts upon the road. They'd placed themselves two metres apart. Guns held at the ready as they faced a number of Factionless whom were busy rummaging through rubbish.
Slowing my pace I stopped beside the guards. Throwing a questioning gaze as I asked. "Is everything alright?"
The Iniates had caught up. They began to gather around, catching their breath.

"Its just a precaution. But we've got it's under control" The guard, Bud, replied respectfully.
Though he was older then me, I held authority over him, with my position in surveillance. The chain of command in Dauntless depended greatly on your positioning during your Initiation. Come in at the bottom of the ranking board,  you got the crap jobs, no one else wanted. Like cleaning, cooking. A step higher and you could find yourself guarding the wall, or walking the streets on patrol. Maintaining control over the Factionless, like Bud. 
Top six,  would usually end up as surveillance in the control room. Monitoring the comings and goings in all the Factions. A precautionary measure to maintain that peace was kept; and the laws were not broken.

Come in first, or second.. If you were lucky and had impressed, they'd try to recruit you for Leadership. I'd been asked twice to train for Leadership now. At first I'd thought it was a great way that I could ensure things were kept fair. That the Dauntless creed'  

                                                 To believe in the ordinary acts of bravery,
        in the courage that drives one person, to stand up for another,
To shout for those that can only whisper. 
Or defend those who can't defend themselves. 

 would be upheld. 
To Eric's delight, I'd quit the moment I'd found out things were not what they first seemed in Dauntless Leadership. 
I'd asked Max to position me in surveillance instead. Telling him I'd rather train the Initiates when they transferred in. It wasn't a lie. I did want to train the Initiates. It was the only way I could try to shelter them from Eric's cruelty. 
I wanted to give them a chance to grow in courage and strength. Not send them fleeing in fear to be Factionless .Or worse, crushing their spirit so hard that the only option they thought left to them, was death. 
And surveillance? It offered me the perfect chance to find out exactly what Max and Jeanine were up to. I'd already found out that Eric was still really Erudite! He had been planted in Dauntless with the sole purpose of him taking a Leadership position at the end our Initiation. I'd been the only thing standing in his way.

I glanced across to the Factionless. A couple of them had stopped to stare at me. I knew they remembered my Mother. That they saw me in her. 


I'd had a confrontation with one of them just before I'd transferred to Dauntless. 
I'd climbed in through a window to an abandoned building, thinking I'd seen fire. He'd come from no where. Told me I looked like my Mother. It had hurt me. It had stabbed at my heart. It wasn't that he remembered my Mother, she had always shown the Factionless so much kindness. It was that the only good memories I had growing up, had been with my Mother. 
It was that she'd been taken from me. 
That I'd been left with the monster who was my Father.

 photo look_at_him_zpsxwh5gjvp.gif



I stared back at them.
Maybe they were really the lucky ones. No one expected anything from them. They were free to be themselves. No governing laws of Faction telling them that they should be this or that they should do that. 
There was no one to to make them feel bad for being themselves. No fear of not conforming or being good enough. They didn't have to think to hard about their choices or dwell on their mistakes. 
They didn't have to run to try to escape their thoughts. 
They were free...

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