My 16 locked and loaded, all fear has been avoided,
Raphael Douglas Miller
You say the words and my weapon is drawn.
A country boy born somewhere in rural Idaho to parents Liliana Marie and Robert James Miller, was always closed off to himself, escaping the problems at home most often in abandoned buildings, farms and houses left behind. It wasn’t such an unusual thing due to the fact they were located in what could only be described, middle of no-effin- where. His mother although a licensed nurse, worked at a diner as a waitress, a few hours from home, catching the bus at the interstate every morning for her shifts, leaving Raphael and his younger sister Layla at home with their father, Robert. Most of the time, the two younglings would find their way through a hole in their property’s fence, not wanting to be left alone with the angry alcoholic man. His father was a military veteran, discharged with honors, a fact that should make the family feel safe at such hands but it was the extreme opposite, verbal abuse that sometimes escalated to physical abuse, he often pressured Ralph to be more of a man than he already was, making the household an unbearable hell.
At age seventeen, Raphael lost his beloved little sister to illness. Although he surely knew such fatality wasn’t his fault for not being able to save her, he felt everything was slipping through his fingers, like grains of sand. Such guilt and grief was something the male never really recovered from.
His father as soon as Ralph turned eighteen pressured the young man to quit his job at the local supply market to join the military, to honor his country and his bloodline of veterans. Fearing that the situation at home would become even worse, the tension stiff as a string since Layla’s death, his mother dropped her hands and eased the young man to follow the elder’s wishes.
Deployed to Afghanistan, although the young man hated to be doing what he had to, he excelled, being soon nicknamed a gunslinger. Glad to have been able to escape from home, he felt more at ease knowing that he had a purpose and he functioned mechanically, not giving his feelings much room to take over his thoughts.
Staying there for five years, he was discharged with honors and sent back home after being shot during action on his left shoulder, the bullet passing through, making his left arm movements impossible for a couple of months, besides also being left partially deaf of his left ear due to the close-range shot.
Deciding not to come home to face his father once again at such failure, he never reached out to inform he was back in the States. Renting an apartment of his own in Nampa, Ralph let himself heal, and quickly enough was back on his feet working at a hardware store, having to somehow make his living once again, although his paranoia and depression aggravated once he was back from the field.
Months passed by, and he recurred to the passion he had as a child, of exploring abandoned buildings, but this time, he started filming his findings and uploading them to YouTube, which to his surprise, a lot of people enjoyed. He kept at it, until being able to live off that.
Full Name: Raphael Douglas Miller Nickname/Alias: Ralph, Doug, Douglas, Mills, Gunslinger. Meaning: Raphael is a name of Hebrew origin, from rāp̄ā (רָפָא "he has healed") and ēl (אֵל "God"), yet, Douglas is derived from the Gaelic elements: dubh, meaning "dark, black"; and glas, meaning "stream". Origin: Chosen by his birth parents. Ocuppation: He is a Youtuber that does tours of abandoned houses, former soldier. Any Pets: Tommy, a belgian malinois he served the army with. ID Number: He prefers not to reveal that. Signature: Cursive, blocky with jagged edges due to quickness. Gender: Male. Gender Role: He's masculine in his manners. Orientation: Bissexual with male lean. Real Age: Twenty-Six. Age Appearance: He looks his real age, besides the dark circles constantly under his eyes. Birthday: June 26th 1993. Deathday: Still alive. Birthplace: Somewhere in Idaho. Species: Human Ethnicity: Caucasian Blood Type: A positive Preferred Hand: Right handed. Facial Type: Squared. Eye Color: Icy blue. Hair Color: Naturally dark blond but dyed black. Hairstyle: Short and spiky. Complexion: Slightly tanned. Body Type: Strong, muscular arms, toned body. Height: 6ft 4 ½ (194.3 cm) Weight: 210 lbs (95 kg) Facial Hair: Light stubble. Shoe Size: 15 Birthmarks/scars: Deep scar across the inside of his left forearm that extends to the inside of his elbow, scar from a former piercing on his left eyebrow. A gruesome scar from a bulletwound on his left shoulder. A small beauty mark on the right side of the bridge of his nose. Distinguishing Features: Very apparent tattoos and piercings. Health: Decent. Energy: Enough to earn his living. Memory: A strong trait of his. Allergies: Bacon, sadly. Handicaps: Hearing from left ear compromised by a close-range shot next to it. Medication: He prefers not to disclose which. Phobias: Heights, ghosts, any bad other wordly experiences. Addictions: Drugs, black label prescribed medication. Mental Disorders: Depression, paranoia, panic attacks.
Status: --- Whom: Name Dated: 00/00/0000 Engaged: 00/00/0000 Married: 00/00/0000 Children: Name (age). Name (age). Name (age). Our Song(s): Song by artist. Song by artist. Song by artist.
Comments: Ut a pellentesque ipsum. Phasellus volutpat, magna ac laoreet tristique, mi purus finibus ipsum, non pharetra magna turpis at nisl. Donec eget lacus hendrerit, congue purus scelerisque, bibendum orci. Vivamus non justo felis. Suspendisse augue lectus, vehicula at nulla eget, fermentum placerat magna. Nunc luctus purus ut lorem lobortis condimentum. Nam bibendum volutpat elit, et efficitur dolor malesuada eu.
Pellentesque accumsan, eros ac ultricies vehicula, enim orci hendrerit quam, at porttitor leo odio sit amet libero. Sed porta sem eu metus malesuada hendrerit. Sed at sapien ac diam vestibulum ultrices. In eget commodo lacus. Maecenas sed nisl quam. Donec pulvinar, nisi non rutrum cursus, nisl mauris luctus diam, eget eleifend nunc massa ut dolor. Nunc consequat fringilla massa, vel consequat ex interdum et. Pellentesque risus neque, tincidunt vitae sodales a, placerat eu ex.
Friends & Family
I suddenly realized that we were on borrowed time, that time is always borrowed, and that the lending agency exacts its premium precisely when we are least prepared to pay and need to borrow more.