Gender: Female
Age: 31
Sign:
Pisces
Country: United States
Signup Date:
July 12, 2018
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03/14/2021 12:16 PM
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because of you.
Because of you Even if it was just the tiniest step forward in a path that was adding up to more leaps and bounds backward until she felt like she was making any progress, it was an improvement. Betty wasn't giving herself enough time to cope with her pain, and she wasn't patient with herself or with others. It hadn't been long since she'd been kidnapped, but she was already venting her frustrations on herself and Jughead, an innocent, helpless bystander on whom she was taking it out, or perhaps she was having a nervous breakdown. Her expectations were set way too high for herself, challenging to meet, and Betty should have been powerful enough not to let them influence her too profoundly, as they were for most things. She was embarrassed that they'd succeeded, that their intent had broken her and that now her dreams were filled with nightmares about it. Any control over her was trapped, taunted, and tortured. In the aftermath of a nightmare, or sometimes in the obscurity and comfort of one's own bedroom, She took a deep breath and stared down at the floor to calm herself down.
"All I want is for it to go away." I'm tired of fighting and tired of trying." She admitted, taking a hesitant drink with shaking hands while keeping the glass steady with both hands. As she lowered the glass to rest against her leg, Betty shook her head. "Who am I? Is it difficult? I used to be certain, but now I'm not so sure. I told myself the whole time I was in there that I was stronger than all of his torture. I was passing the time before I could find a way through the other side, and maybe I had to convince myself that to get through the day. But I'm not so sure anymore." She confessed with a shrug of her shoulders, her muscles already exhausted and sore from all the stress she was keeping in her body.
"Perhaps this was all along with their scheme. My mother, the sisters. Trashbag killer, the black hood. It wasn't so much about being there as it was about how they managed to get into my mind and how I wasn't as good as I thought I was..." As her eyes dropped to the brim of the water, she drifted off, somewhere lost in her thoughts, as she anxiously rubbed her fingertips over the glass's edges.  I never stray too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me Because of you I am afraid
I lose my way And it's not too long before you point it out I cannot cry Because I know that's weakness in your eyes I'm forced to fake A smile, a laugh everyday of my life My heart can't possibly break When it wasn't even whole to start with
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03/07/2021 05:33 PM
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The voicemail.
The voicemail The voicemail bot's dial tone cuts off Jughead's last, clearly inebriated words. Betty listens to the audio file once more. As a result, it's being re-played. Parts of it replay in her head as she goes through her daily routine: making coffee, turning on the tub, placing fresh kibble in Toffee's bowl, and fulfilling her prescriptions.
To keep her hands busy, she runs a cleansing mask through the ends of her hair in the shower, tugging at knots that refuse to budge. It's difficult to stop memories from creeping in once they've begun. She's cleaning her teeth harder than her dentist encourages, in the hopes of accelerating the receding of her gums and increasing her tooth sensitivity.
Her first cup of coffee has a lot of sugar in it; maybe she blended it too strong or didn't notice how full the spoon was. She reappeared the summer after graduation, a year after Jughead's scheduled reunion and her confession. Betty didn't expect Jughead to show up, but she did anticipate Archie and Veronica being present. She stood in the parking lot for thirty four minutes, debating and weighing the advantages and disadvantages of walking through the diner door and into the booth across from him.
He seemed to be very lonely. She was frightened. Betty isn't aware she's crying until she looks in the mirror with her makeup wand in hand and notices she's crying. Before applying concealer, she can wait until the swelling has gone down. Even the top she's wearing under her blazer will need to be adjusted. The overheated, panicked feeling coursing through her is shown by red splotches that run up and down her breast bone. There's something that I feel I need to say But up till now I've always been afraid That you would never come around And still I wanna put this out
You say you got the most respect for me But sometimes I feel your not deserving of me And still you're in my heart But you're the only one
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03/01/2021 12:16 PM
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POV.
pov They don't exchange words. That is pointed out many times by Jughead. He doesn't even text her; instead, he sends her email messages and text messages with prospects and people to contact. Tabitha Tate is the person to communicate to. Seek clarification about The Mothmen, if she hasn't already. The emails are usually just as silent. It's odd, but not in the way you'd expect. Jughead is supposed to be there, but he isn't. While there is a second party involved in this investigative process, she and that individual only communicate by text, never phone, never agreeing to meet face to face, and undoubtedly never interacting.
He avoids her as if she were toxic, which she later realizes is an appropriate description. She is a dangerous person. She had unquestionably destroyed his life. What has he been through in the last seven years? That is entirely her responsibility. Betty is lonely, as she has always been. It maintains to reemerge in her mind months later. With her face suddenly shut, she could hardly see the concerned face of a nursing assistant. "Sweetie, are you sure there is no one else I could call? You've experienced a great deal just this week. You should be supported by someone.." It's the same now as it was before. Betty is the one who performs the interviews. She keeps track of the facts. Betty makes a list of current affairs. She doesn't have a murder board in her building. The Blonde doesn't scour the internet for details. She is unhappy with it. No, it's not real. There is no one.
In her defensive strategy, the dumb, pointless words trigger hours of idiotic, hopeless sobbing after she recognizes a box of their old investigating resources and recalls how things used to be. When demons lingered in the background, Jughead would still be there with his loving embrace. When she felt as if she was losing herself, she remembered his voice say, "I recognize who you really are." It was better while they were present. It's horrific, but she's who she is now, and Betty has long given up on the notion that she could be better and stronger. The Black Hood's youngest child. She recalls casually saying it to Donna at a time when it didn't seem like vilification. I wanna love me (ooh) The way that you love me (ooh) Ooh, for all of my pretty And all of my ugly too I'd love to see me from your point of view I wanna trust me (trust me) The way that you trust me (trust me) Ooh, 'cause nobody ever loved me like you do I'd love to see me from your point of view
couldn't believe it or see it for myself Boy, I be impatient, but now I'm out here Fallin', fallin', frozen, slowly Fallin', got me right I won't keep you waitin' (waitin') All my baggage fadin' safely (my baggage fadin') And if my eyes deceive me Won't let them stray too far away, I
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02/19/2021 11:47 PM
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river of tears.
In a river of tears Her concealer's vital sign was not functioning as advertised because her mother only made two remarks about the bags under her eyes. She was exhausted about Polly and concerned about it. How was she just twenty-five and so emotionally drained already? She had left her life to return to Riverdale, and for what? To watch even more of the four of them assassinate themselves?
And they were worried that they would be more likely to succeed than the first time. Betty missed going to sleep and lay in bed. The peaceful serenity of hours of being oblivious at a time, her unwavering conviction that in the morning everything will look far better. That time would have started to heal all her wounds. This was a lie. Everywhere throughout her body, there were raw wounds, and no one was paying attention. For years, it was just that way. She'd smile and tell them everything was perfect. And they would trust her. The girl next door was asked by nobody, the girl who did everything for everybody and fell apart in the end.
It was isolated, she thought, sitting in a group of people she used to know better than anyone else, telling herself that she no longer knew them at all. It made Betty ache for what it was like being sixteen again to see Veronica laugh and Archie grinning at her and Veronica. She wanted to curled into a booth at Pop's next to Jughead, not at a table between Archie and Kevin and Toni, wondered what happened to her life. I'm going down, and you have watched me drown In a river of tears, lost beneath the stream Under the waves, I've found the strength to say The river of tears has washed me clean
Lost in the tide, I can't keep my pillows dry Like there's a sea in my eyes I realize that sometimes love brings you flowers Then it builds you coffins And far too often We end up falling to our demise
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02/14/2021 03:16 PM
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valentine.
valentine Betty lingered in their bedroom doorway leading out into the living room, smiling softly to herself because she saw him stretched out on the couch from afar after pulling out on Serpent's activities a late night. She didn't ask, he didn't say, but she did not want to know the details right now because the most important thing was that he was home, that he just wanted her. Betty was wrapped over her shoulders by one of the knitted throw blankets from the end of their bed and pulled tightly tucked under her chin with her hands curled up under the material.
She'd awoken, not even knowing what time it was but heard the faint sounds of the television on in the living room and knowing he'd likely drifted off before managing to make it to their room. She hated when he wore himself so thin, running on little sleep and pushing himself to the point of exhaustion for both her and the sake of the Serpents. It was far from easy to be in control, and in his sleepy eyes, she could read the weight of the workload, the dark circles underneath, and the fact that he still had his boots half unbound before falling asleep on one end of the couch. In a moment of reflection and admiration, Betty squeezed her lips together, the sleepy way he gazed at her from across the room and beckoned her over with a needy wave of his hand.
To show a glimpse of skin for his benefit, she opened the blanket, wearing only a pair of short pajama shorts and a tank top baring her midriff. As she traveled around the living room before basically jumping on him on the couch as she settled in against him and the back of the sofa, her favorite cozy nook, she grinned, quickly closing the blanket around her again. As she redistributed the blanket over the top of both of them, Betty laid her head on his chest, tucked just below his chin, although the size of it fell short of his full height and left his shoe-clad feet exposed as she nestled in against him. "Happy Valentine's day," whispered Betty; she raised his head to kiss his cheek and saw that his eyes were closed again, a satisfied smile on his lips as he went back to sleep. With your face and your beautiful eyes And the conversation with the little white lies And the faded picture of a beautiful night You carry me from your car up the stairs And I broke down cryin' was it worth this mess? After everything and that little black dress After everything, I must confess I need you
o stand outside my window, throwing pebbles, screaming I'm in love with you Wait there in the pourin' rain, come back for more And don't you leave 'cause I know all I need is on The other side of the door
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02/12/2021 10:41 PM
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Grace.
Grace The very next murder victim is here. The very first one in Riverdale, anyway. Since she stepped into Riverdale, They haven't quite discovered the remains, but they're getting the call. Betty trips to the secluded area where the body remains, wrapped in a sheet, over a couple of stones. Maybe she did not realize living in Riverdale for so long, maybe her dad or midge, as she became numb to finding bodies like this.
She looks at the scene, communicates to a few police officers and Jughead, agents, next to the body. She's walking up to him, and there's a tone on his face that she notices, a glance of hesitation that he hasn't been carrying since they came back.
This would be Abbey. Betty recalls Abbey Joslyn. In reality, Betty can't help but remember Abbey, looking at her now, eyes frozen in terror, stripped and surrounded by foliage. Betty has dealt with a lot of cases, but this one hit differently than usual. Abbey was in class with her. Betty had been connecting with her, her first associate, since the age of three. When Jughead and Archie would hang out with each other and not wanting a girl around. She would go see Abby. The way Abbey used to smell it was always like lemon; betty can still smell it. When Reggie made fun of her in first grade for having a ponytail, she protected Betty. When she reopened the Blue and Gold, she was also the first to send an inspirational note to Betty. When people thought betty was crazy for not believing the farm. She said it was okay. After discovering her father was dead, Abbey came up to her and gave Betty's hand a reassuring squeeze.
And now she's gone, left like rubbish in the forest, and Betty wanted to contact her mother and father, where the kitchen she's been sat in for countless meals. Thank god she wouldn't have to see Abby's room. Betty feels her eyes swell and changes direction back the tears furiously, trying to train her face into a neutral tone.
She feels a cautious hand on her shoulder, then the voice of Jughead, saying her name soft and low. Jughead hasn't been that soft with her in years. She's Betty Cooper still. She's an employee of the FBI. She has already been through worse. In the grand scheme of things of her career, she's gone through worse. She got captured, But she's okay. She shakes her head swipes her eyes with a desperate hand. She says, "I'm all good," and she is conscious of how her voice doesn't shake. Just more mature. She's instructed by a police officer, and she takes it in, but she can notice Jughead's eyes worrying about her all the time. On the verge of almost bleeding you out Are we too wounded now to ever come down? Oh, how I long for us to find common ground I've got nothing but you on my mind
I'm not ready to be just another of your mistakes Don't wanna let the pieces fall out of place I was only just a breath removed from going to waste 'Till I found salvation in the form of your Your grace,
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02/05/2021 01:08 PM
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this is me trying.
this is me trying She graduated from high school. Everything else seemed to be so very far off but already past. Even though Riverdale had criminals, someone was always watching you. People dying. Oh, it was her home. Her mom, her sister, jughead jones, was here. Go to the FBI. Betty started to feel comfortable with what she was doing now. She was now going to be thrown into another city,
It makes her almost bitter because over time, wasn't the agony supposed to fade? Wasn't this supposed to be heading in the right direction? She just kind of gets used to the trauma, if anything, and learns to live in the philosophy of 'it is what it is.'The people who felt like that were forever in her life. They slipped through her fingers. She instinctively knew that Veronica, and herself, maybe all right down the lane. At any time, Archie could call. It was a childhood friend. And she had so many doubts about Jughead. When she finally sees him, what would it be like? He would still be a part of her. She wasn't able to prevent trying too hard to forget him. But he was always there at the back of her mind.
It's a loop that now represents her life. The work. Domestic. The work. Domestic. Repeat and repeat. Perhaps you'd call it dull. She solves crimes and finds family members that are missing. Frequently, when she's fortunate, she reconnects with a family, then when she's not, Betty tells them she's sorry, and she proceeds on her way. She's got, acquaintances. Betty has friends nearby. Sometimes, if she feels like it, they go out for dinner, sometimes for a good party. She isn't necessarily alone, not really. She's fulfilled and content. She is happy. Was she thrilled, though? she questioned herself every day. They told me all of my cages were mental So I got wasted like all my potential And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad I have a lot of regrets about that I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here
And it's hard to be at a party When I feel like an open wound It's hard to be anywhere these days When all I want is you You're a flashback in a film reel On the one screen in my town
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01/30/2021 11:28 PM
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heavy.
Heavy Routine. It was the one thing Betty had left to cling to since everything, the reveal of her father to be the Black Hood that had long since been her greatest fear and suspicion upon her investigative team-up with Cheryl Blossom. It was the only person she knew to turn to, whose own father had betrayed her and her family in the cold-blooded murder of her twin brother. Cheryl's own sinking feelings about Hal had only worsened what Betty had probably already known deep-down for some time. Maybe it was the night in that house on the edge of Fox Forest when she was forced to put on the same ski mask, and the Black Hood all but revealed his identity to her by putting a mirror in front of her and warning her that they were one and the same. It sent another shiver down her spine.
She doubted that the darkness he claimed that existed in all of them. It was too easy for her to recall the same memory he did that night in the booth at Pop's after the surprise birthday party from hell she'd masterminded from her own good intentions. The confession she'd told him about the crescent-shaped scars on her palms and the darkness she feared resided in her. It still made her sick to her stomach, finally getting the confirmation she'd always worried that the darkness was real. It wasn't a sickness that she'd manifested and made up some part of her, with the reveal of her father as the Black Hood solidified the worst things she'd already hated about herself her entire life.
A couple of years later, Betty felt like she was in the same position; this time, she was a senior and about to graduate. It was her real-life brother. he wanted everyone to pay for everything they did. Charles took her under his wing taught her everything she knew. Betty somehow started to feel like she had a purpose, and it felt good. Helping Riverdale even if it was small. When Jughead asked her if she was okay. Betty was truthful; she wasn't sure how to feel. Her brother was a murder. she was helping him. Last time Betty had so much guilt about what her dad did. In both minds hal and Charles mind, they need to be taught a lesson. She couldn't even progress it. That's one thing her cousin had in common. Carrying the weight of what their family did. Would she always be labeled as the girl they had in the family that killed people in Riverdale? It felt every time she started to build a future for herself and somewhat being okay. She was slapped in the face. One stepped forward and two steps back. . the blonde was walking around her bedroom. Everything seemed to be uneasy. Could she for once go to sleep without a worry? one thing she was grateful for was that since Jughead's family moved in. he slept in the same bed. Betty sat on the edge of the bed, wrapping herself in the covers, slowly closing her eyes. I know how I can be It's making me anxious, don't know how to save this If it's heavy for you, then it's heavier for me I know you're tired of the sh*t I pull But you still pull me through I must've had my eyes closed
If it's heavy to you then it's heavy for me too I know you're tired of my highs and lows But you still hold mе Ooh, I must've had my eyes closеd
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01/22/2021 01:45 PM
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Love of a Daughter.
Love of a Daughter In the five minute drive that it took to get to the Riverdale Cemetery, the sun had started to set when Betty parked the car. She watched over the small town as she waited for the dark to set in. It didn't feel right to confront her father's corpse during one of Riverdale's beautiful sunsets. He didn't deserve anything beautiful, even if he was dead. He earned the cold, dark night and his six-foot grave and the graffiti and trash around his headstone. Betty continued to sit in the driver's seat, just simmering in all of the anger she'd accumulated over the week. From Brett. From his weak attempts at intimidating her. Jughead not telling her things. Jughead writing about her father for his book. Yale not accepting her for who she was, her traumatic experiences and all.
When the town finally felt dead, Betty got out of the station wagon and grabbed her father's sledgehammer. She marched over to the far corner of the cemetery where the town had insisted she bury her father. Out of sight, out of mind, right? At the time, she had believed that her father deserved a proper funeral. Only ten people showed up, and she knew that they were only there for her. They weren't there to mourn her father; they had all come to comfort her. Most at school had turned a blind eye to her father's death, but those that didn't insist it was for the best that the Black Hood was dead, and others were glad he had kicked the bucket. Betty had once mourned the loss of her father, but now she was nothing but resentful of him. Betty saw the trail of trash coming from the single grave, no less than fifty feet away from the rest of Riverdale's dead citizens. Maybe when she was done, she'd find a dumpster full of horse sh*t and have it overturned on his grave. Perhaps she'd feel better then.
Betty let him know how much pain he was causing her, even while he was rotting in his grave. He had screwed with her past and present, but now he was messed with her future. She thought she could have been safe from him after he was gone, but she was angry that wasn't the case. She was disgusted, just standing in front of his headstone. Only then did she allow herself to get even slightly emotional. She usually just bottled it all up and waited to see Jughead so that she could let it all out in private with him while he held her close. She felt a few stray tears running from her eyes, and she didn't even try to stop them as she berated her father for everything he'd done.
Then she picked up her sledgehammer and swung it down forcefully, breaking off the corner. It felt good, even though the tears and anger. So she hit it again. And again, and again. She wanted to turn it into a pile of pebbles. Soon, she was screaming and growling her resentments as she swung and swung and swung, tears streaming down her face. Her mother showed up at some point, grabbing her and taking the sledgehammer from her hand.
Betty truly broke down then. Her body slacked as she collapsed into her mom's arms. Her body shook with sobs and embarrassing cries. Her mother said a few things to her, cupping her face in her hands to force her to look at her. Betty became even more emotional, as her mother was finally there when she needed her most. She held her tight, the hammer dropping to the ground at some point. Alice just stood there and comforted her for a few minutes before taking them back to the station wagon. Alice made Betty get in the passenger side and threw the hammer in the trunk before driving them home. It's been five years Since we've spoken last And you can't take back What we never had Oh, I can be manipulated Only so many times Before even "I love you" Starts to sound like a lie
For the love of a daughter Don't you remember, I'm your baby girl? How could you push me out of your world? Lied to your flesh and your blood
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01/09/2021 12:07 PM
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ANWNF.
ANWNF All night it felt like Betty was holding her breath, convincing her dad to come home when he surprised both her and her mom with flowers before opening night, the pre-show jitters backstage with her best friends before her brother mysteriously appeared to ruin their fun. Waiting. It wasn't a feeling Betty was accustomed to, unsure of what exactly she was waiting for beyond the rise of the curtain and the first opening number. Things with Veronica were beginning to feel normal again, mended after taking a long hard look at herself through the lens of the characters they'd been cast and seeing the position of herself. Through Veronica's bad girl character when she thought she'd been the innocent girl-next-door the entire time.
The sins of Hiram and Hermione weren't to be laid at Veronica's feet, and she'd lashed out on more than one occasion with the intent of hurting the other girl so severely and what did that say about her? Of course, all was forgiven in the eyes of the raven-haired princess, just as easily if the tables were turned, and perhaps Betty was cautious in everything feeling right again. Archie and Veronica seemed as happily together as they'd ever been, and Betty finally felt like she had both of her best friends back in their rightful places in her life. Apart from the foreboding feeling she couldn't precisely pinpoint surrounding her brother, her parents too were trying to make amends, and that was all she could have hoped for.
Betty was never used to the spotlight, not like Cheryl or Veronica, who seemed so well suited for the stage, but it was fun for her to do her hair, do Sue's costume, and get to be someone other than Betty Cooper for a while. When Kevin first approached her for the show, she'd been quick to decline, claiming that just because she enjoyed singing in her bedroom didn't mean she should be put in front of an auditorium full of people. From the first rehearsal forward. Betty, too had been bit by the acting bug, and apart from the drama of their social circle and high stakes, she was glad for the reason for everyone to come together, including the Serpents and when her mother had been cast as Carrie's mom.
It was now, hair feathered out perfectly to frame her face as she watched from the wings as her mom sang her solo part for Midge's entrance from behind the staircase door. The blocking was fabulous by Kevin's hand and the sets even better, having thanked Mr. Andrews at least a hundred times for all of the hard work he'd put into the production from his own construction company. Toni and the others all hovered around, eager to watch the performance while also remaining concealed behind the curtain, but suddenly there were gasps from the crowd as the set rose up, a shrill shout from somewhere in the front rows following. It was Cheryl's voice screaming out for someone to help her, and suddenly everyone was surging forward; Betty carried in the throes of her castmates as everyone caught sight of the horror of their friend pinned to the blood-smeared wall with various sharp objects.
She could feel her stomach drop, instant disbelief shielding her from the horror of it all but shattered suddenly when her mom screamed from across the stage, throwing the entire auditorium into chaos and panic. The lights were shut off instantly to keep Midge's body from remaining on display, but suddenly everyone was pushing and shoving, running away to safety as a mob ensued. Still, Betty found herself moving through everyone else, not away from the scene of the crime but closer to the set where her friend's body remain limp and lifeless, smeared in her own blood. Yeah, my life is gonna take flight Can't wait 'til Saturday night You ain't seen nothin' yet It's gonna be a night we'll never forget You ain't seen nothin' yet It's gonna be a night we'll never forget You ain't seen nothin' yet It's gonna be a night we'll never forget
don't turn the other cheek For some pathetic freak Carrie White's got a lot to regret (This will be just great) This will be great Forgetting never not twice (Not right) Can't wait 'til Saturday night
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