#secret

Ten Years Ago
 

TW; Grooming, sexual assault, and eating disorders. 

Some secrets are meant to stay secret forever. That was how Mackenzie had been raised. She could still remember her grandmother’s comment when she’d come out to her as bisexual. She’d grown up in an extremely religious household, but it wasn’t the fact that Mackenzie was bisexual or that she had a girlfriend that bothered her grandmother, but what those around her would say. She was worried about what her friends would say. As far as she was concerned, Mackenzie could do what she pleased and sleep with whoever she pleased as long as it remained a secret. Secrets were the foundation for any strong family. That was how she’d been raised and that was a lesson that she would carry with her throughout her entire life. Maybe that was what made it easy for him. He was supposed to be a friend. He was the “only one who understood and accepted her”, or at least that was what he told her. With every touch and every glance, the fourteen-year-old became even more convinced that she was in love. “Age is just a number”, “no one will understand”, and “it has to be our little secret” were sentences she heard often, and she believed it.  

“Here, you have to eat something.” Glancing up, Mackenzie offered a small smile and shook her head. “I already ate,” she mumbled as she gestured to the plate covered in crumbs that she’d placed on the bench. It was a trick she’d learned a few months ago, a trick that would fool all of those closest to her into thinking she had already eaten, so when they questioned her, they would be none the wiser. Truthfully, she had eaten anything but half a carrot, a couple of grapes, and a cookie that she immediately felt guilty for eating. He had told her that she was fat and needed to lose a few pounds. She would be beautiful if she dropped that last few pounds, so she’d attempted to do just that. Hearing her phone beep, she glanced down at the screen before looking over at her sister. “I have to go.” Kenzie pushed herself up from where she’d been sitting and bit down on the inside of her mouth as she slowly stood and offered her older sister a small wave before she turned on her heels to go and meet him.