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grief | mini drabble
Loss has a funny way of changing people - you grow a thicker skin to shield you from the wounds that are left unseen, you prioritize the ones you love over your own needs, and you learn to cherish every tiny detail about a person, no matter how unimportant it may seem to others. You study their mannerisms for so long, and somewhere along the way, they become a part of you, and the realization brings a smile to your face.
But loss also has a way of knocking you off your feet, leaving you scatter-brained and breathless. You suddenly search for any ounce of that person in everyone else you meet. This one has his laugh, that one has his smile, and the one over there shares the same sense of humor he did. You’re left yearning for anything that reminds you of the home you once had, of the people you once loved, of the people that left too soon. You dig and dig, until there’s nothing left to search for, and it works - for the most part. You get a little bit of satisfaction knowing that there’s pieces of everyone you’ve ever loved left behind in the people that you’re lucky enough to still know.
But then the day fades, and it hits you all over again - they’re never coming back.
And so, the cycle continues. You wake up and start the day with a cup of coffee, and look over to the empty chair across from you, wondering what life would be like if they were still here. You look over to your child, and wonder if they question where their daddy went and why he doesn’t love her anymore. You try your best to live life like you once had, but you search for him in everyone you cross paths with, disappointment seeping through your veins when you no longer find him. The grief comes in waves, but the ache of losing someone is always there; it demands to be felt, screaming at you until you’re left screaming too.
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