Faith�s was slowly drifting, the sound of Sammy voice invading her solace. Dean jerking the steering wheel caused her to snap up right alert. She rubbed her face wiping the signs of the invading sandman away. Stretching provided little relief for her sleep deprived body. Everything felt sore and stiff. Dean pulled over gassing up the impala and passing the wheel over to his brother. Faith followed suit stepping out of the car to look in the back seat at the petite with a crooked grin, �my turn blondie.� The women traded places. Faith slumped down in her seat tugging her jacket around her like a blanket as the car pulled out of the station.
She chose to remain with drawn on her side of the vehicle part of her riddled with guilt. The things she had done in his absence were less than honorable. The remark he had made about being bad for her was still reverberate in her head.
The sound of Sam�s voice jolted Dean back from the edge of slumber.With his eyes wide open now, he pulled the steering wheel back to the center.The Impala had begun to drift to the road shoulder.The tires on the right would have started jigging and bouncing when they hit the raised safety dots on the pavement edge.Maybe that would have roused Dean, and maybe the Impala would have flipped into the ditch.Either way, it was time to yield the driver�s spot to someone else.
They�d passed into Nevada a few minutes prior.Ahead was a sign and offramp for the town of Mesquite.Dean glanced in the rear view mirror at his brother.Dean�s eyes were bloodshot and underneath them dark circles outlined puffy bags.�No, Sammy.Not there yet.Another 4 � hours.But we�re almost to Vegas.�He piloted the Impala into the offramp, up the incline to a stop sign, then right to a Shell station.�I can�t drive anymore.I don�t exactly want to sleep either,� he was afraid of where his nightmares would take him, �but I�m gonna get us all killed if I stay in the driver�s seat all the way to L.A.�He pulled up to the pump and checked the gas price � $3.57 a gallon.Not good, but not as bad as in the backwoods of Colorado.
Dean exited the driver�s seat, unhooked the gas nozzle from the pump and jammed it into the car�s gas intake.When the petrel was flowing, he opened the car�s back door.�Come on Sammy, out of there.My turn.�He was going to separate Sam from Jo, unless Jo took Faith�s seat in the front.But it didn�t really matter because Dean was about to keel over from exhaustion.
Maybe it was the hum of the Impala�s engine, but Sammy slept like a rock in the backseat.Maybe he needed to sleep back here more often, instead of those sway back beds in the cheap motels they always stayed in.His back had been hurting lately.Sam awoke slowly, with the morning sun in his face and a weight on his shoulder.He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes with both fists and took note that Jo was asleep on his shoulder, her golden blonde hair spilling down his shirt.There was a little drool spot below her partially open lips. Adorable.
When he stirred, so did Jo, who sat upright, looking maybe a little embarrassed for having slept on Sam�s shoulder.But he didn�t mind.Not one bit.Dean was driving.Faith had her head leaned back against the headrest in the passenger seat.Maybe she was asleep, maybe not.On the radio a guy was trying to get the listeners to buy used cars at a place called Bob�s Cheap Heaps.Outside, miles and miles of desertscrub were rolling by. The golden morning light was coming in low and warm, creating long shadows in back of each shrub, and each hummock of grass and sand. Might be southern Utah, might be the great Mojave Desert in California.
�Are we there, yet?�Sam knew the answer, but had to ask the question.It was a ritual.
The coffee helped.Sugar candy would have helped too, but Dean would have to keep fueling the sugar beast within to maintain the high.He didn�t want to do that, so the coffee was supplemented by tortilla chips.Denver came and went, then Grand Junction.KDEN was replaced by Grand Junction�s oldies station, KYOY. They�d pick up the I15 in southern Utah and ride it southwest through Vegas and Barstow to L.A.But the City of the Angels was still many hours and many miles away.When Faith started talking of train wrecks, his dad, Bobby, and Rachel, a glow was rising in the east, in Dean�s rear view mirror.
The news that John and Bobby had turned to the bottle didn�t come as a surprise.There�d been many a time when Dean had turned to alcohol for a little solace.He had no doubt that the average Winchester liver was way below average in function and health.One of the costs of being a hunter.But the news about Rachel hit hard.Rachel was the feisty heart and soul of this operation. His kid sister had more spunk and optimism than any of the rest of them combined, even after all she�d been through.Rachel would keep them going even when things had completely turned to shit.He took his eyes off the road for a moment to glance at Faith.The glare of approaching headlights came and went on her face.�I want to keep tabs on Rachel.If she takes a turn for the worse or something else bad happens, like she needs to go in for surgery again, we�re turning this boat around.Family comes first.�Which was something he didn�t really need to tell Faith, she knew it better than anyone, maybe even Sammy.
With eyes back on the road, Dean explained, �I�m doing ok, under the circumstances. That place I was in...�He shook his head.�Doesn�t matter.I just need to forget it.It wasn�t real.All made up shit.�He gripped the steering wheel hard, as if he�d never let go.�I just need to drive, babe.Bobby and my dad turned to the bottle.Some people have to break things.Others go off by themselves and stew.Everyone�s got a way of dealing.Right now, my way is to drive.I�ll be ok.�
�Dude you look like shit,� Faith slid back into the passenger seat handing a cup of coffee to Dean. It was too soon for him to be hoping back into the life of a hunter. It probably wasn�t safe for him to be behind the wheel either. He had just been through hell literally. Driving was probably his way of coping with things. Faith was trying to humor him, but he couldn�t avoid the past forever. Eventually he would have to stop get some rest. She glanced over her shoulder at the slumbering pair. They looked kinda cozy in the back seat. �Want me to take the wheel for awhile?� she sipped the hot liquid attempt to stay alert. It was exceptional bitter. The pot had probably been on the burner all night. People like them the only ones to drift through the place at this hour. Dean didn�t want to relinquish the wheel.
They weren�t even half way there yet. There was over ten hours left on their journey. �Why don�t we pull over for the night catch a few zs?� she settled back in the seat. The sentiment normally would be followed by a suggestive remark implying the things they could do in a hotel room. There were ways to wear him out. She didn�t figure he was ready for that. It was incredibly awkward trying to figure out how to handle things. She was holding back walking on eggshells. �At least let Sammy take over for awhile,� the youngest had a least had a nap. He was stubborn refusing to turn control over the impala. They drove on for miles. The silence was unbearable. It had been like this since they had headed out.
She broke the tension rambling. �It was has been a real train wreck without you. Your dad was hitting the bottle real hard not that I was no slouch myself. I could drink the bar dry not say that he couldn�t almost could drink me under the table. At that was til Anna Eden came along. Old friend of his seem to settle him down a bit help him get through things. Bobby was on the same page as the rest of us about drunk himself into a coma, real hermit locked away with his books looking for answer. Sammy�..� Faith glanced over her shoulder at the sleeping Winchester. He had taken it the hardest of the clan. Liquor didn�t even provide solace. �Lil sis tried to move on took a job at the bar helping Jo. She�s a real firecracker that one takes after yours truly. One night she took a bottle to the head. It was bad Dean. She had to have surgery hasn�t been the same since still hoping she will pull out of it.�
Given what had just happened to him, Dean knew he shouldn�t be driving.In fact, he was having flashbacks, bolts of memories from hell.As hard as he tried to push them to the back of the nearly full warehouse that was the inside of his head, he couldn�t quite do it. One moment it would be him and his friends in the Impala, rolling down Highway 61 towards Ogallala and the I80 interstate, and the next he�d be listening to Faith scream while those sick bastards tortured her.But she was sitting right here next to him, untouched, perfect.It had all been an illusion. He knew that now, but the imagery had been so convincing and so thoroughly horrendous, cutting him to the bone, which was what it was all about.He just hoped the flashbacks didn�t turn into a movie, taking his attention off the road for too long.He really didn�t want to wind up in the ditch.It just might send him, all of them in fact, to hell in a fashion that they wouldn�t come back from.
Dean glanced across the seat at Faith.The moonlight was backlighting the curves of her face and highlighting her dark hair.�Faith, if something happens to me� you need to take the wheel.�But the music coming from the Impala�s speakers � Foreigner � and the steady, rock-solid but velvety hum from the car�s 348 cubic inch, Turbo-Thrust V8 engine comforted him, soothing his troubled mind.With the steering wheel firmly in his grip and his girl by his side, Dean thought he could get through this.Everything would be ok.
The miles blew past them as the moon declined into the western sky.They stopped for gas at a truck stop outside of Fort Morgan, Colorado along I76.By then Sam and Jo were asleep in the back.Jo�s head was on Moose�s shoulder, and his head was lolled back over the seat, his mouth open ready to inhale moths or beetles or whatever happened to fly in the window.They looked cozy back there and he wondered if anything had happened between them since he�d been gone.
Faith came back from the minimart with coffee and tortilla chips.Road fuel.He considered handing over the wheel to her, but he was afraid of falling asleep.He was quite certain of where his dreams would take him.The only alternative was to drive.
Sam didn�t see that right hook coming. Not the fist flying at his jaw nor the anger that propelled it.But after he crashed into that table, busting it in two and stars stopped flashing and spinning before his eyes � just before the pain in his jaw settled in for a long stay, throbbing like he was hitting himself with a rubber mallet 70 times a minute � he knew that this was just part of the process Dean would have to work through.Dean had been in some sort of hell for who knows how long � time usually moves at a different pace in those dimensions � it was a wonder he wasn�t completely wacked, broken.In fact, he very well might be broken in ways that would never really be fixed.Only time would tell.But if punching his brother helped in any way, then Sam was willing to take one on the chin for Team Winchester.
After extricating himself from the shattered table, Sam stood to massage his aching jaw.Those stars began to spin around his head again, threatening a blackout, so he leaned over with his hands on his knees and took a couple of deep breaths until they cleared.From that half-bent position, he complained, �Dean, I think you loosened one of my teeth.�But his brother wasn�t paying attention to him.His focus was on Faith and what she was saying.
Sam pushed himself to his full height again, this time with more success, although the throbbing in his jaw only got worse.Faith was heading for the door with Dean�s gaze still focused on her.She�d said something about the key.To the Impala.Sam slipped it out of his pocket.�Dean.�When his brother looked his way, Sam tossed it to him.Dean�s look was still hard, and lacked any hint of apologetic expression.�Listen, bro.I wasn�t gonna let you stay there.And I wasn�t going to let Faith sacrifice herself.You would have done the same.�Without comment, Dean turned away from him and walked towards the exit.
So it was a road trip.Sam spotted Jo Harvelle.She was headed his way with a knapsack over one shoulder that Sam knew held weapons and a few personal items � a hunter�s overnight bag.So she was coming with.They followed Dean and Faith into the parking lot where everyone piled into the Impala � Dean in the driver�s seat, Faith riding shotgun, and Sam and Jo in the back.L.A. bound.It was going to be one helluva long and awkward drive.
Dean knew exactly how to press her buttons. He had a lot of nerve telling her that they should have left him there and that he wasn�t good for her. �Don�t start with me Winchester,� Faith stood up pressing her palms into the table. He had returned from the dead. She had to be without him for far too long. This was the only reason she didn�t knock him out or call him an asshole storming out pushing the door off it�s hinges.�Your all I have,� digging her finger tips into the table top. Faith�s mother had been a prostitute and her father locked away for murder. They both died before her 18th birthday. She grew up neglected and abused, mistreated by those around her without almost a friend in the world. Men used her. She put up walls developed a thick shell. Dean happened to come into her life before the final brick was laid. As a general rule she didn�t let anyone too close. He knew that. �My life is nothing without you,� she was frustrated. He was upset speaking without thinking. She was a slayer. It was hard dangerous life with or without him. It proved nothing without someone to care for she would have been wreckless. A part of her seeking release from her pain and burden.
�I�m a big girl. I knew what I was doing. Didn�t need baby brother holding my hand,� she snapped. Dean lost it striking his brother. Sam tumbled backwards into another customers table. �You got that out of her system,� she met his gaze as he turned back around. He then proceeded to declare that he was coming along with her to Los Angeles. Probably didn�t plan on letting her out of his sight. This was going to make matters complicated. �You got the key?� she raised an eyebrow. She then looked down at the man on the ground. He wanted to go somewhere he needed Sammy. �I need a smoke I�ll be outside,� she pushed past him.
She was leaning against the impala taking a few drags off a cigarette when they finally emerged. Tossing the remainder into the gravel she ground it out with her boot. The road trip would take them a good twenty hours. Considering the frame of mind everyone was in it was going to feel longer.
He knew why they did what they did, although why they�d risk their lives for him was beyond Dean Winchester.He was no prize, no real champion.He wasn�t worth saving.Yet they�d done it, they�d brought him back.He was grateful, but he was also pissed.
�Yeah he told me.�Dean shook his head.�You should have left me there.I�m not worth your lives.�He searched Faith�s dark, alluring gaze.�Haven�t I proved that to you over and over again?I�m no good for you Faith Lehane.And this little incident proves it.�
He stood up, a little shakily.He faced his brother, Sammy, who was 8 inches taller than him.�Faith is still new to the shit we do, but you� you should have known better.�Dean threw a right hook that connected with Sam�s jaw � cold clocked him and sent him sprawling into an adjacent table, scattering the three hunters who�d been seated there.
Dean turned back to Faith, massaging his right hand.�I really hate L.A.�Los Angeles is way, way too big and it�s populated by eccentrics and new age hippies.�But if you�re going to L.A., then I�m going with you.Where�s the Impala?Let�s get this show on the road.�