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06/21/2022 01:32 PM 

Louksna Pupos -- Moon Child

"Labho id pelnis. Tu wailos, bhrater." A freshly skinned pelt was passed to the boy of barely twelve years in age. The blood smeared across his hands as the fur was laid across his arms. Vacant eyes of the white wolf looked back at him, causing the child to whimper. The eldest of them, nearly twenty-two gave a low grunt, tilting his head upward, indicating the boy needed to get control of his emotions, lest he appears weak. Weakness would get you killed. Akjes was nearing the end of his time among them. He would soon settle down within the community with a home and a wife. He would turn his back on his brothers until they too came of age and followed in his footsteps, as he followed his brethren's footsteps for as far back as they could remember. Gergo, on the other hand, was the newest initiate to this brotherhood of warriors. He had no choice. He was old enough, his family cast him out into the wilderness, and the wilderness he would become.Their warrior band stood around a fire, all eyes on the child. Faces streaked in paint and dirt and blood all turned to their leader as he continued the ceremony. Some of them were with braided beards in a variety of personal styles, adorned with beads or bones belonging to their respective trophies, meanwhile, still others were not yet old enough to even grow facial hair. Heads were predominantly shaved, some had haphazardly cut by a knife in short crops, others long and braided, woven with minimal adornments. Young men with brown hair and olive complexion, all of them, iron-hard from a feral life; some scraggily and some trim, still others bordering on gaunt. Wearing only the pelts they themselves earned upon joining the brotherhood, their exposed skin told a story of battles, each scar was a memory.Akjes held up a clay mug. He was an imposing figure with a shaved head and toned form, a physique earned by many years of reveling in the blood of neighboring clans. To see him fight was to see a wild animal in a frenzied feeding. He did not stop until the village was emptied of opponents. It was a small wonder why he was their leader. Passing around the cup, each brother drank from it. As the ceremony concluded, Akjes told them all to get some sleep. They were going marauding at dawn. Brothers around Gergo gave him hearty thumps on the back as a parting congratulations. Each calloused hand hit with a little more than the scrawny boy could quite prepare himself. He'd flop forward with an 'owf!' The others would laugh, making jokes that he would grow strong with time. Bundling the wolf pelt, the small boy went to the river instead of his bed. He washed the wolf pelt of the blood and any remaining gore. The last thing he wanted was to attract insects or wear the stink of decaying flesh.Standing at the shore with only the moon's light, Gergo set to work on his task. From the periphery of his vision, movement drew his attention upwards. There was a woman. Out here? And she was the most…unnatural…creature he had ever seen. She was pale like death with hair as silver as the moon. Gergo had once seen a man with blonde hair; he wore it long and took great pride in the golden tresses. People said he was blessed by the gods, maybe he was even the son of god! Such a color was rare. Never had Gergo seen anyone but the elderly with such white hair. If that weren't odd enough, though, the clothing she wore was like never he had seen before. So stunned, the boy nearly dropped his pelt in the river. "Albhos kerom? Qid tu?""Who---are you?" Nox was just as stunned. There was a naked boy washing a wolf skin in the river! The wolf skin was one thing, but the boy…something was very off about the whole thing. Never had she heard of humans running around naked. And in the woods? Was this some homeless kid? No, this was not the forest she entered. The air was different, it was cleaner than any air she had ever breathed.

Sʏᴍᴘᴀᴛʜʏ for the Dᴇᴠɪʟ

06/21/2022 10:33 PM 

coronation. / drabble

trigger warning: death mentionPrince Dorian Blackwood enters the throne room of the Blackwood Castle. Everywhere he looks, he can see grandiose statues of gold, gorgeous jewel-toned tapestries, and ginormous plates of the most decedent cuisine that surely taste every bit as wonderful as they look. The room seems to stop for him, and eyes stare on in intrigue. He holds his head high, despite the increasing discomfort that has him wanting to jump out of his skin. His father has been preparing him for this night all of his life, and now that it’s here, he's not sure what he should do. His father can only guide him in spirit now, as he makes his way across the ballroom. He follows the invisible footsteps before him – the same ones followed by his father, and his father’s father – and he makes his way to the throne.People begin bowing to him the way they once bowed to his father, one by one as he passes by. He notices at first, but once he catches a glimpse of the man in dark clothing, serving Dorian his crown on a lavish red pillow, he can’t pay attention to anything else. Somehow, by the time he reaches the end of his walk, he needs to be man enough to be the new King of Ravencross. He’s been left with no choice.He’s soon standing face-to-face with the man in black. The man in black removes the crown from the pillow and hands it off, then Dorian kneels down and he awaits being crowned. Right away, he feels the weight of his father’s passing being placed on top of him – he feels the curse that’s constantly coursing through his veins now more than ever. He sees his own early demise, and he sees the fall of his kingdom should he never be able to break the curse on his bloodline. Still he stands, and he faces the crowd of people, balancing the heavy crown on his head and keeping a stone-cold expression.He takes a seat on the throne he inherited, and the crowd is silent, awaiting the customary speech he remembers watching his father make years and years ago. “We were not expecting to say goodbye to our king, and my father, Emrys Blackwood so soon. I know….we were all heartbroken, and we were all scared…But I intend to rule in his image; I intend to rule as the King he would want me to be. I will not let his death be in vain, and I promise…to serve my people the way he always did.” The longer he goes on, the more his voice begins to crack beneath the pressure of his own grief. He mourns for his kingdom, but most importantly, he mourns for his father who never had the chance to live life beyond their cursed bloodline. “I will see to it that this kingdom survives. You have my word.”The room erupts in applause – he can hear nothing but hope springing from the mouths of a tormented kingdom. He only prays he can make good on all of these promises.


06/21/2022 10:32 PM 

morning routine.

The concrete beneath her is freezing cold, and her oversized jacket did nothing to protect her the entire night. The backpack she used as a pillow has deflated enough for her to feel everything hard object in there – her phone charger, her headphones, her hairbrush. She was so tired the night before, she hadn’t even noticed how wickedly it wreaked of piss and stale garbage behind that Shell Station, but now it’s everything in her not to gag each time she breathes in. The sun’s just beginning to rise, but she can’t lie there anymore. It’s been probably two weeks since she’s closed her eyes for eight full hours of sleep, and she’d give anything for a break even if it’s just for one night.She gets up from the ground, and she slings her backpack over one shoulder, while her free hand takes a hold of her rolling suitcase that’s just big enough for her clothes, makeup, and a few things so she can fake a shower. She comes to the front of the gas station, and then pushes the glass doors open. It’s dead silent in there, because it’s so early in the morning. Her presence draws the attention of the single cashier standing behind the counter, so she smiles at him and then she keeps walking towards the restrooms. She opens the door to find it’s one of those single restrooms, which gives her an ounce of privacy to get ready in.She washes her hair in the sink – dries it beneath the hand dryer. She changes out of her brown sweatsuit into a lacey black skirt she wears at least three times a week and the same tank top she had on the night before. She brushes her teeth and sprays on perfume. Her running shoes are replaced with a pair of clunky black heels. She lines her bloodshot eyes with a thick, black rim, and she uses some glittery eye shadow to draw attention away from the exhaustion even she can see. She paints her lips red, and she runs her hairbrush through her semi-clean hair.No one will ever guess now when they look at her, that she’s starving. No one will ever guess she’s wincing because her back is sore from sleeping on the cold, hard ground. No one will ever guess she’s on the brink of crying because she’s so exhausted. Of course…even if they could guess, would they even care?


06/21/2022 10:01 PM 

terrible in storms. // drabble

trigger warnings:child abuse, verbal abuse,spousal abuse  Terrible in StormsCynthia's POV It’s nearing 8pm, on a school night – under any other circumstances, they wouldn’t have Jacob up this late, but the homework he wanted help with hours ago is trying them all. Cynthia feels guilty every time she sees his eyes fill up with tears as he tries to make sense of the words on the page he’s reading, but Eric feels enraged and makes him start over every time. He tries sounding things out – she’ll give him the answers and he forgets right away. Then he has to start over again, and Eric reminds her to ‘stop giving him the answers.’ ‘He has to figure it out on his own,’ he keeps saying, but the simple fact is – he can’t. Not with eyes full of tears, and a belligerent father screaming in his ear. Those words are right at the tip of her tongue, but it’s nothing she’d ever dare say.Once again, Eric makes Jacob start over again and Jacob makes the unfortunate mistake of fumbling the very first sentence. Eric shoots up from his chair, causing both Cynthia and Jacob to flinch as he screams, “Jacob, you JUST learned this!” She doesn’t have time to encourage Jacob to be quiet before he shouts an apology that only makes Eric angrier. The back of his hand meets her seven year old son’s face, and right away sends him into hysterics expected of a child who is in pain. Jacob yells, he covers his swollen face, and he begins to cry hard enough to break her heart.Eric lifts Jacob’s face by his chin, points a finger at him and warns Jacob never to talk to him like that again. When Jacob nods, Eric lets him go and he sits down on the other side of him again. He makes Jacob start over, and they both listen as he struggles through the first two pages of Biscuit Goes to School. Eric allows him one or two mess-ups, and then finally he’s about to explode again. Instead of striking Jacob again, he gets up from the table, and he grabs his cigarettes. “Deal with this,” he says to Cynthia before storming out of the kitchen.She’s terrible in storms, but she’s okay cleaning up the aftermath. It’s much easier to show her affection and not be punished for it when Eric’s not around. She reaches out and wipes the tears from her son’s eyes with her thumbs and then she smiles at him, hoping maybe he’ll find some solace in that. “Okay, why don’t we start as slow as you want to…okay?” She offers.“Can we stop now?” Jacob asks, his eyes pleading with her.She wants to let him off the hook – she wants to let both of them off the hook, but Eric will ask as soon as he comes back. She doesn’t want either one of them in any more trouble than they already are, so she places her hand on Jacob’s shoulder and she shakes her head. “I don’t want you to get in trouble, baby,” she says. He seems to understand, and without arguing, he starts over for her.It’s going to take them all night, but no sleep is better than whatever Eric would do if she let him give up now.


06/21/2022 08:19 PM 

AC #30

A Day In The Life Of Lily Marie Bower   6am - Hear the alarm blaring on the bedside table and attack the snooze button until it gets stuck before rolling over and going back to sleep.7am – Repeat 6am but panic a little because you think you’ve slept in for too long. Glare at the clock and realize you can sleep a little longer8am – Finally crawl out of bed, shower, dress, and try to look like a normal human being for the day. Walk carefully out the bathroom, keeping an eye out for the demonic hell kitten and its sneak attacks from around every god damn corner.8:46am – Cuss and yell at Pickles for jumping around the corner and attacking your legs and feet again. Tell Pickles that if he does it again, he’ll go live somewhere else. You know it’s a lie, he knows it a lie because you love the little hellspawn.9:04am – Finally get out of the house and climb onto the bike to head to Motek for the morning coffee. Annoy Atarah until she kicks you out and tells you to hurry up and go to work otherwise, you’ll get yelled at again. Find a table outside and sit there for another twenty minutes scrolling through social media and if the mood strikes, take a selfie.9:27am – Finally get to work and park in the normal spot but complain that it’s too far from the door and sit there for a minute debating whether you really want to go inside and have a productive day.9:43am – 10am – Finally go inside because you need to be productive. Unlock the office door and grumble about the mess that you left the day before. Try to clean up before everyone else arrives but somehow make it worse. Make a note to hire someone who is super organized to help with the cluster f***.10am – 1pm – Throw yourself into the workload, forgetting that you need to eat throughout the day and only stop when the hunger pains are consistent. Move into your back office and order something because you’re not organized enough to bring lunch from home. Sit down for an hour and pretend you don’t exist while sending Lucy all the memes you can find.2pm – 6pm - Continue working until it gets dark outside, and you are the only one left in the garage. Finish up what you’re doing and lock up for the night. Climb back on the bike and head out to whatever bar takes your fancy for a little drink.6pm – 7pm – Find a place that sells food as well and have dinner out because you know you can’t cook to save your life. Scarf down some food and a drink and realize that you’ve had enough of being in public and head home.7pm – 8pm – Finally get home and forget that Pickles attacked you this morning. Go hunting for said demon spawn and force your love on the kitty before feeding him again and making sure he’s a happy little bean.8pm – 10pm – Get a bottle of whiskey and pour a couple of drinks before sitting in front of the tv and either binge-watch a show or a movie. Periodically message people throughout the show/movie until you fall asleep on the couch.12am – Wake up on the couch with a stiff neck and scamper off to bed, ready to repeat the same again the next day.

Peyton (17) (T) Trans

06/21/2022 01:23 PM 

Shadow hunters

[email protected]

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 11:21 PM 

Free Fallin'

free fallin' feburary 24th, 2003trigger warnings; drugs & overdose Today had started out a normal day for Stevie, a rare day where she could just stay at home and do absolutely nothing, but she doesn't know how to do anything of that nature. Since she has a few days off Fleetwood Mac's Say You Will tour, she decided to come home to Phoenix so she could work on some of the new album -- whenever it decides to come together the way she desires for it to. Today had started off a normal day for Stevie, her taking a break from writing to do some cleaning.Today had started off normal, that was until Tom Petty called and said he was getting on a plane to come and see her because this "isn't news she should receive on the phone"From the moment she hung up the phone with him a couple of hours ago, her mind was racing about what it could be. Was he sick? Did something happen with Annakim or Adria? She'd hope if one of them was in the hospital he would just tell her to fly out to Los Angeles instead of flying to Phoenix to tell her. Did he and Dana get a divorce? Did she do something? There was a reason that Stevie didn't like Dana, and she hasn't figured out since they've been married what it is -- maybe something happened and Tom is telling Stevie privately and away from LA so Stevie doesn't go off on Dana? But, the feeling Stevie has had in the pit of her stomach is saying it's worse than any of that -- and there are only a few things that are worse than anything she thought before.Attempting to keep herself busy by rearranging things in her kitchen, her heart sank to the pit of her stomach as soon as she heard the doorbell go off. Stevie went to go open the door as her mind kept racing. If something happened to one of Tom's girls she'll lose her mind, hell if something happened to Tom she'll lose her mind. It was entirely too close with Tom right before he went to rehab for his heroin addiction, she couldn't handle him coming to tell her he has a terminal illness or worse, he relapsed.As soon as she opened the door and saw Tom's face, saw the hurt and sadness in his eyes, the redness from him not sleeping she knew it was bad. She knew it was something that was going to affect her probably just as much as it did him. "The kids are fine, before I say anything else" Stevie let out a relieved sigh, moving over so Tom could walk in as she shut the door behind him. Knowing the girls were okay was a sigh of relief, but now her biggest fear was that something is going on with him. She almost lost him with the heroin, she couldn't lose him to anything else."Okay, what's going on then?""Howie..." Stevie's heart sunk, all Tom had to say was his name for Stevie to realize what had happened. The fight that Stevie and Tom had that eventually convinced Tom to go to rehab for the heroin, Stevie brought up Howie and how she knew he was too far gone and she wasn't going to stand around and let him get to that point. "I got the phone call a couple of hours ago, I called and told the band but I knew, given how close you and Howie were, I couldn't tell you over the phone..." Stevie's heart shattered for Howie, he was one of Tom's dearest friends, a former Heartbreaker, and one of the few people Tom felt wanted to be around him for Tom Petty the person and not Tom Petty the rockstar."Oh, honey.." Stevie wrapped her arms around his neck, Tom burying his face in the nuzzle of her neck as she tried to rub his back to calm him down. She knew nothing she could say or do would ease the pain he was going through, and she knows him well enough to know that the reality of he could've been Howie was sitting in. She also knows how he's blaming himself because he's going to feel he didn't do enough to try to save him. "Don't do that. I can feel it. Don't blame yourself for this.""How can I not, Steph? I should've dragged him with me to rehab, I should've done an intervention with you and the band, I should've stopped f***ing buying the sh*t and going to his house to do it with him.." His body shook as she knew he was trying to keep his emotions intact, Stevie felt a few tears rolling down her cheeks as she continued to rub his back to try to ease his mind. "It could've been me, it should've be -""Don't you dare say that! Don't you dare say it should've been you.." Stevie's voice cracked as she spoke, pulling away so she could look at him, her eyes saying more than her voice ever could. "It shouldn't have been either one of you, and Tom if I thought he would've listened like I eventually got you to listen, then we would've begged him. But, he was too far gone, Mike and I had a whole conversation at your Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction with the band about it. This isn't on you, don't blame yourself, please?""He just wanted to be free for a while, free from the world and its heartaches, I guess at least he got what he wanted".  stephanie 'stevie' nicks-petty template credit.


06/20/2022 10:11 PM 


The crowd is alive, filling up The House of Blues in Las Vegas, Nevada with a never-ending wave of sound. It’s the crowd reaction all the people who work at the venue joke about – it’s thunderous, and ear-splitting all at the same time, and yet it’s what Jacob lives for. He steps out from behind the drums, and he joins his brothers at the front of the stage and the crowd doesn’t stop. It somehow gets louder when they join hands and they bow for one final time, closing out the show. They split away from each other, and Isaiah begins tossing out guitar picks like he does. Jacob gives out his drumsticks to two people in the front row, and Casey gives away his setlist to the security guard because they all know someone is going to ask for it.When they enter the backstage area, Jacob’s right away greeted by Lorelei Gray – the two share a kiss and he brings his arm around her waist while she tells them what a good show they had. “You too,” Jacob smiles at her.“Us too, right?” Christian Thompson chimes in, earning some laughs.It’s become tradition that 24 Times Rock, Lorelei and Sugarpill usually stick around for a few hours after their shows and sign autographs while the roadies take care of all of their equipment. The crowd in Las Vegas is just as wild by the fence as it was inside the venue. Isaiah comes out, then Christian and Casey together. Jacob leaves with Lorelei and the rest of Sugarpill is behind him. Jacob takes the right side of the fence first, and he starts signing autographs and taking pictures. What causes him to stop is the is his name being called in a voice too familiar to ignore. He straightens up, and he notices three familiar faces – two of which put a smile on his face.Mary Brooks, David Brooks, and Lily Brooks – he’s assuming; his younger siblings he hasn’t seen since he moved out to California are standing in front of him on the other side of the fence. Mary’s the one who called his name, and she’s all smiles. She approaches him first, hopping up on the bottom rail of the fence and wrapping her arms around Jacob. He hugs her back, and then begins urging the crowd to move aside so Lily and David can get through. They don’t have the same confidence that Mary does to charge through a crowd without a single care. “Holy crap, what are you guys doing here?” Jacob asks.“What’s it look like?” David jokes.“I want to let them back here,” Jacob says to the security guard, before giving David his attention. “Dad let you guys come here?”“Yeah, he wanted us to!” Mary says.Once the fans finally clear out, the Brooks’ siblings stay behind and Jacob lets them onto the tour bus. As soon as Mary sees Casey, she goes in for a similar hug like she gave Jacob. After expressing excitement to see Casey, she begins freaking out over the tour bus. “This is so cool,” she says. She pauses when she sees Lorelei and Christian sitting on the couch in the tour bus. “Oh, Lorelei Gray – I’ve been a fan of yours forever, and – I started listening to Sugarpill just recently, they’re really good – “ she rambles and Jacob can’t help but smile.“Okay, okayyyyy, loser, I think they get it,” David teases her, so she quickly elbows him in the side, causing him to grunt.“Don’t be a jerk, David,” she complains.“Okay,” Jacob interrupts. “Uh, Lorelei, Chris….this is David, our younger brother…and Mary and Lily, our sisters.”It takes them a bit, but soon Mary gets to explaining how she asked Eric if she could finally go to a 24 Times Rock show, because Eric had been acting so much different lately. “Actually he wanted me to tell you guys he wants to see you guys, I guess…” Mary says.“Why?” Jacob can’t help but ask. Mary shrugs.“No idea,” she says.“He’s been kind of a little bitch lately,” David says.“’Kay?” Jacob raises a brow.“Anyways, mom wants to see you guys too…I don’t – know about Jennifer really, sorry, Casey…but they were kinda hoping we could talk you guys into coming back home, since…you guys got a couple days off.”

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 09:57 PM 

word vomit

word vomit june 20th, 2022 I don't even know where to start writing this entry, it's been a hell of a weekend and I still have tomorrow left to do.When I saw Lindsey's name on my phone as I got off stage last night, my heart dropped and my frustration went through the roof. I was expecting a war, anger, something about my marriage or whatever and it was none of that. I will say, the news he told me was a lot easier coming from him, which is what he said, but a longtime member of the Fleetwood Mac family and someone who's toured with both Lindsey and myself during our solo tours, and was currently working with Lindsey, Brett Tuggle, died yesterday. When you're my age you're used to losing people because it happens almost so frequently, but this one hurts, he was a good guy and a damn good guitar player. He'll truly be missedThis weekend was full of Pride, singing, and plane rides. It's been a bit since I performed and then jumped on a plane to head to another location, but I'd do it all over again to do San Fransico Pride because that crowd was easily one of the best crowds I've ever had the pleasure to perform in front of. I even somehow convinced Thomas to get on stage with me -- even if we messed up the words to Stop Draggin' My Heart Around because we were stoned off our asses. Marriage goals, I guess?And then there was Bonnaroo, and to be the first woman to headline that is one thing. To be the first woman, who's also a 74 year old woman who hasn't put out an album since 2011 and hasn't done a full tour since 2019 mindblowing. Even having a career that spanned over fifty years as I have, still being able to be the first woman to do something is pretty remarkable if I do say so myself. That crowd had a million reasons to be tired, a million reasons to leave early to beat traffic, and yet they all stayed. I was in the wings with my husband and a crowd of thousands was chanting for me - and again, I've been in this business for a very long time, but when you can have a crowd in your hands before you even walk out on stage? That's a 'you made it' situation more than winning any award will ever be. Tomorrow is my last show of this leg of the tour in Nashville, ironically I can go visit my son and then go do what I love to do. And then I'm off til September, but am I ever really 'off'? The crowd loved me doing Cryin' in the Night last night, so maybe I should add that to the second leg of the tour? Maybe I should release a new album between now and September and do some songs from it? Maybe I should just relax and enjoy the summer? I don't know, I know I go home and my one year wedding anniversary is this weekend, and then Lord only knows where the road will take me. All I do now is after tomorrow, I'll be craving that high that being on stage gives you until SeptemberStevie. stephanie 'stevie' nicks-petty   template credit.

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 09:55 PM 

dance with my father

dance with my father june 25th, 2021 "TeeDee, this guy is a good goy, I'm glad that you guys rekindled your friendship, you know that, right? I know that you were so worried about how I'd react about you dating another rockstar after everything with Lindsey, but I don't know, I always knew he was different since we first met him at one of your concerts ages ago"Arms snaked around her waist as "Landslide" played on the speakers out in the garden, Stevie shaking her head before resting her forehead against his shoulder. She couldn't ask for her father and husband to get along more than they do now. He was right though, Stevie was so scared to tell her parents she was dating someone else in the business after the turmoil they watched her go through with Lindsey Buckingham, but something just felt different about this."I know, Daddy, but I'm so grateful that you and Mama love him, and I hope that when you're no longer here and something is weighing heavily on my mind you send me a sign so I know you agree with my decision" Stevie paused as her song came to an end, Luther Vandross' "Dance With My Father" started playing, the blonde looking over her shoulder as she saw Tom talking to the DJ, a smile on her lips as her attention turned back to her father. "I told Tom once in the 90s if you guys were ever here when I got married that I'd want to have our dance to this song..." Stevie's voice trailed off, looking down at the ground so her father didn't see the tears forming in her eyes."I will always send you a sign, Stephanie, but you aren't going to need my approval forever, your mother and I raised such a smart woman. And, is that so? Well, why are we standing here then, TeeDee? This is your wedding, your mother and I are here and the song is playing. Let your father have this dance?________________________________________________________The dream she had a million times since the mid-80s played in her head as she and Tom sat beside each other in the courthouse filling out paperwork for their marriage license, Stevie was pretty quiet as she was filling out her part of the paperwork. Her parents were there through so much of her life, but not having them here for a marriage that her mother had been wanting since 1985 was bittersweet. Yes, she knew it would be impossible for her to have them here given her age and everything, but it doesn't mean that this still isn't bittersweet.Reaching in her pockets as she let out a groan, Stevie handed Tom the clipboard and pen. "I'll be right back, I forgot my wallet in the car." Stevie chuckled, shrugging her shoulders before she'd walk through the hallway to the main entrance. She was totally unprepared, but she and Tom decided this late last night, that they just go and get married instead of waiting and having a big wedding. Still, in the back of her mind, Stevie just wanted a sign that she was doing the right thing, a sign like her father said so many times before both before he died and in her dreams that he'd send.Opening the car door a few minutes later, Stevie slid into the driver's seat and started looking for her wallet. As soon as she sat down, however, she had an overwhelming urge to turn the car, and even though she spent a few minutes fighting it, Stevie eventually just pushed her index finger on the button to turn the car, her breath catching in her throat as soon as the radio kicked on."And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hillsWell maybeWell maybeWell maybeThe landslide will bring you down"Stevie, who had just found her wallet in the cup holder turned her head to look at the radio as she felt her right eyebrow raise and her heart skips a few beats. Sitting back up in the car, she went to go turn the car off as the DJ was speaking, she heard the beat, she heard the starting keys and the first two lines of songs as Stevie felt her eyes water before she slid down in the seat. All she's been asking for, pretty much since she and Tom rekindled their romance, was a sign that her parents would approve. There is no way, out of the billions and billions of songs in the world did Landslide and Dance with my Father play back to back. "Back when I was a childBefore life removed all the innocence My father would lift me highAnd dance with my mother and me""Oh, Daddy, how I wish you and Mama were here. Mama, you finally have what you wanted, you always said Tom was the one who would understand more than anyone. And Daddy, thank you for keeping your word. I love you both, and I miss you both so much..."Sitting in silence as she listened to the entire song, Stevie choked back on a few tears before pulling down the sun visor and quickly checking her makeup to make sure it hadn't smeared. Once the song was over, she'd quickly turn off the car before putting her wallet in her pocket and getting out of the car. Shutting the door and locking it up, Stevie looked up at the few clouds in the sky with a smile on her face. "I love you. I miss you. Thank you..." she whispered to herself before slipping the key fob into her pocket and started her walk back to the courthouse to marry the man of her dreams -- and with her father's approval.  stephanie 'stevie' nicks-petty   template credit.

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 09:55 PM 

San Francisco Pride 2022

"WELCOME EVERYBODY! I hope, from the bottom of my heart that each and every one of you is enjoying the second day of this beautiful Pride weekend and massive party due to Kambria and Gretchen - two of the baddest women I know. Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm sick of standing here after sitting so long in my Target lounge pants watching reruns with my dog, so you ready, Mike? let's rock!"Outside The Rain/Dreams. - Bella Donna; 1981/Rumours; 1977Soldier's Angel - In Your Dreams; 2011."I wrote this song many years ago after visiting Walter Reed Hospital and meeting all the brave young men and women who were in there. I walked in with nothing on my mind and I walked out a mother, heartbroken for these young men and women that had to pay with their minds and bodies for our freedom. I haven't done this song in quite some time, but deep down I always knew that I'd have to dust it off - and I did.Gypsy - Mirage; 1982"This song is about a few things, it's about finding freedom, it's about a store I used to shop at back when Lindsey and I were first trying to make it big in the business before we joined Fleetwood Mac called the Velvet Underground. It's a song about my best friend, Robin, who had recently died when I wrote it. These days, it's about all the gypsies in my life that are finding their ways, that are getting rid of their fear, and finding love. These days it's about the six most important girls in my life - LeeLee, Stella, Amethyst. Adria, Annakim, and Kenny finding their way through this crazed life - and one of them six is why it's always on my setlist."Bella Donna | Wild Heart - Bella Donna; 1981 | Wild Heart; 1983 Rhiannon - Fleetwood Mac; 1975Landslide - Fleetwood Mac; 1975"This next song, everyone knows the story with this next song, and everyone knows that I dedicate it to either someone or a few people everytime I sing it, and given what this month is and what this weekend is, the list I could dedicate it to is so long I could write a book. I dedicate it to all of you, may you find peace in gathering like this and find pride in who you are, and never let anyone try to talk you out of being anyone else but yourself. I dedicate it to my children, who I have loved for as long as I can remember, and love you like you're my own, I dedicate it to my husband, the man who's found me a million times over the last 40 years, and we finally got our heads out of our asses and decided to make sure we never lose each other again. I dedicate it to my father, Jess, I know you're still standing beside me as you have everytime I've sung this song since you used to jokingly insist the song was about you. I love you, I miss you.Stand Back - The Wild Heart; 1983Free Fallin' - Full Moon Fever; 1989 [Tom Petty Cover]Edge of Seventeen - Bella Donna; 1981encore___________Rock and Roll - IV; 1971 [Led Zeppelin Cover]Stop Draggin' My Heart Around - Bella Donna; 1981 [featuring Tom Petty]"So, as I announced on Instagram earlier today, my longtime friend and guitarist, Waddy Wachtel couldn't make it to Pride today and he didn't give me a reason - and that's not really important right now. But, I also mentioned that someone went and got Mike from the airport, and as I was waiting for them I got an idea. I know Steve and Ron are somewhere out there, and Mike is playing guitar on stage with me tonight. Benmont has been doing keyboards for my tour thus far and is for the remainder of the tour. Anyone who knows classic rock knows their names - Steve, Ron, Mike, and Benmont - but there's one missing. After a bit of convincing, and maybe a kiss or two and a promise of a joint when we got off the stage, I figured I should do this song at least once with the person I've been singing it with since 1981. Kam, I also might've used you like a bit of a bribe to get him to do it, Ladies and gentlemen, the Rock and Roll Hall of Famer, the frontrunner, lead singer, maraca shaker, joint smoker of the Heartbreakers, but most importantly the man I'm beyond honored to call my husband - Tom Petty!"

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 09:53 PM 

having pride | journal entry

having pride June 17th, 2022 The one thing I always wanted to instill in any children I had was to have pride in who you are, because if you're not hurting anyone, then why does it matter who you're with or what you like? You can be the kinkiest son of a bitch, or like men and women, as one of the other, date outside your race and religion and if you're not hurting anyone and both of you of  age, then why does it matter who you're with? Furthermore, how can someone tell you that you can't be who you are?So, when Stella came to me when she was about sixteen, long before her father and I were married, and told me she liked women I didn't love her any less, furthermore, I was so proud of her for both telling me and for sticking by who she was. She didn't care who hated her when she came out, she didn't care if it ruined her father's career coming out, she did what she felt was best for her and I love that. I love when Adria came to me while Thomas was recording Mojo and remarked she kissed a girl, and she wasn't sure if she was into women, but kissing her just felt right. I love that, throughout the years, so many people have come to me with help with coming out and being who they are, no matter what it is, Whether it was coming out as gay, coming out as trans, coming out as a whole or just to family, I feel so honored so many have come to me over the years.I sit in a hotel room in San Fransico while my husband finishes getting ready so we can go to night one of a Pride event, and when Kambria asked me to perform tomorrow on the second day I couldn't help but jump at saying yes. I hope my support and performance show people in my generation that sometimes change is good, and sometimes accepting new things in life that weren't as common when we were these kids' age isn't a bad thing. I hope that both my being here and the hundreds of pride events that are going on within this month and throughout the whole summer in general, it slowly help people realize being different isn't a bad thing - it's what makes the world beautiful.Besides, wasn't it Lady Gaga who talked about being born this way? The quicker people realize it, hopefully, the quicker the community that I just love and loves me right back doesn't need to celebrate who they are unless they want to. Hopefully, people realize it so they can just live their lives as we do, so married same-sex couples can just enjoy life like my husband and I do without constantly looking over their shoulder every second of everyday. If there's one wish I have while I'm still walking this Earth it's that.Stevie. stephanie 'stevie' nicks-petty "be that free bitch, baby" template credit.

velvet underground.

06/20/2022 09:50 PM 

she knows

she knows January 16th, 2015st. paul, Minnesota. "I'm going to file for divorce while we have the break for a few weeks, we finish the tour out with the band and then we'll go get married - like we should've been years ago. I love you."The final words Lindsey spoke to her a few weeks prior at the last show of the first leg of Fleetwood Mac's "On With The Show" tour echoed in her mind every day since that night. They've spoken since, well through texts, and his kids did call her on Christmas to say Mery Christmas, but he avoided getting on the phone with her. Stevie shrugged it off, figuring he was trying to keep the peace within the house because Kristen was probably furious that her personal bank account finally saw that she was just using him for money.But, in the back of her mind, she knew it wasn't the reason he was avoiding talking to her, he was avoiding her because he hadn't done what he said he was going to do."Lindsey's not here yet?"Even though Stevie was always the last to arrive at the arena, especially at the start of tours, she wasn't the last one to arrive at Xcel Energy Center this evening -- it was Lindsey."I thought he was flying in with you, babe."Christine's remark just made the back of Stevie's min start hyper-focusing on the fact that what he said to her last month was just words, it's always been just words when it came to Lindsey leaving Kristen and coming back to Stevie - but this time was different. They sat down and discussed moving in together after the show and finally being together, maybe working on a new album together and doing their own tour. Stevie avoided saying anything, mostly because she felt Mick's daggers staring her down, his face probably saying how he told Stevie not to once again go down this road with Lindsey at the start of the tour and Stevie once again not listening. She's never figured out the hold that Lindsey has had on her since they met back in high school, but it's equally alarming, annoying, and sweet because there's only one other man she's ever let as close as she has Lindsey Buckingham - and she knows that will never happen."Sorry I'm late, I almost missed the plane." Hearing his voice equally made her heart skip a beat and her stomach knot up. She knew, she f***ing knows everything he said was bullsh*t and she knows damn well that he didn't "almost miss the plane", he was trying to figure out how to tell Stevie that he once again picked that little homewrecking slut over her - and Stevie once again let it happen."Almost missed the plane? Oh, Linds, you never could bloody tell time"Stevie kept her back to him until she suddenly felt his arms snake around his waist. She fought the urge to melt in his arms as she was used to, instead her taking a deep breath before slowly turning around in his embrace. No sooner had she fully spun around did he bend down and locked his lips against hers for a deep, yet passionate kiss as she felt herself melting in his arms. Damnit, he knew exactly how to do that every f***ing time. Letting out a content sigh when he pulled away, Stevie's eyes quickly went to a red mark on his neck as she felt a lump in her throat, her eyes narrowing in on it as she realized what it was -- a f***ing hickey. In that moment, every thought in the back of her mind since the last show slammed into the forefront, and there was no point in ignoring what her biggest fears were. Stevie pulled away from Lindsey just enough so he could see that she saw the hickey on her neck, her eyes shifting from the mark up to his eyes as a look of hatred and hurt covered her face.Not only did she know all of this was still going on and was going to blow up in her face, but he knows that she knows. stephanie 'stevie' nicks-petty 'damned if i do, damned if i don't' template credit.

ᴊᴇsᴜs ʜ. ᴄʜʀɪsᴛ

06/20/2022 08:20 PM 

ʜᴀʀɢʀᴏᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴀᴜɢʜᴛʏ

September 14, 1985. The Hagan residence on a Saturday night. The transitional time of the year left a humidity in the air despite the cooling temperature. It smelled of a bonfire and rain. Summer’s grip still held firm and it was bound to be a hell of a party – A bi weekly event courteous of Tommy Hagan’s absent parents. He’d been having them nearly a year now. Big draws being copious amounts of his father’s beer and easy access to Eddie’s drugs. Tommy would never admit it, but it was the latter that really drew the big numbers. All the nice conforming boys and girls of Hawkins High would lie to their parents because this wasn’t just sneaking beer. This was the night they could lose themselves for a bit. Tommy knew this, though he’d never acknowledge it aloud. Didn’t need to. Theirs was a transactional arrangement, beneficial to all. They never interacted with each other outside of these exchanges, but every other Thursday as school was letting out, Tommy would puff up his bravado, approach Eddie, and business would commence in preparation for the weekend. It’d always be a good night for Eddie, scratch-wise. Otherwise, he’d prefer smashing his head against a light post than put up with these bourgeoise robots. Aside from some brush ups with the future Hawkins tax payers, though, it’d be without issue. At least that’s how it used to be when Tommy was following Steve Harrington’s ass around. As far as Eddie was concerned, Harrington wasn’t really that threatening. Annoying and full of himself, but outside of his own pretentiousness, he truly was harmless. But this last year, the king had been dethroned. A new, more precarious douchebag had emerged as alpha. Now Tommy was an enhanced version of his former self and his gatherings had become annoyingly aggressive. Monkey see, monkey do. Eddie knew tonight was going to be more of the same as that V8 thundered down the road, Poison blasting along with it. Eddie pinched the bridge of his nose and found a chair to sit down in. If it weren’t for the ounce in his bag, he would’ve just left before the bullsh*t began. The crowd hailed Billy Hargrove when he entered the home, some waif clinging to his uncomfortably tight jeans. “Is it out of fear or love that they revere him, Pippin?” Eddie muttered to his pinky, wiggling it against its ringed companions.  “Hey what’s this freak doing over here?” The room immediately went quiet and all heads turned towards Eddie, still sitting in his chair. Eddie himself did not move, save for the exacerbated sigh that depressed his chest. Suddenly his palms began to sweat and a lump pressed on his throat. There was that word again… f r e a k. It echoed in his head like someone pressing a finger into an open wound. Couldn’t they think of anything better? He wasn’t sure who decided to be a hero tonight, but at this point it didn’t matter. Eddie’s glance quickly flicked to Tommy who wasn’t quite sure how to handle the situation. He wanted Eddie to stay because of his weed, but he couldn’t outright defend the guy. Social suicide. His gaze went to Billy and it was in this moment that the new king of Hawkins High would decide what happened next. Jolly good fun. “And what was the freak doing?” Hargrove the Haughty hissed with his forked tongue while an arm slithered around the waist of his nameless wench. A caveman-like chuckle indicated that the initial, pointless observation came from Mike Lewinski. Yet another mindless Harrington to Hargrove convert and apparently the one who felt the need to start this whole debacle. “He’s friggin talking to himself, Bill. Like some wacko in Pennhurst.” A soft, tittering giggle whispered through the crowd and Eddie closed his eyes. It was starting. Best to call it a night. He could take them on one by one, but a mob full of buzzed, amped up cretins? Eddie still had a strong sense of self-preservation. This wasn’t the hill to die on. So without a word from anyone, including Hargrove, Eddie sprung up from his chair and headed towards the back door. He didn’t make it three steps before that same low, hum spoke again. “And who said you could leave?” Billy stated more so than asked. Eddie sucked his bottom lip through his teeth and shook his head. Of course he wouldn’t get out that easy. He swallowed the forming lump in his throat and his Adam’s apple bobbed. His next words had to be delicate. He didn’t need to be the next rack this Californian beach bum made his bones on. “Got church in the morning. Gotta confess my sins to Jesus.” He felt Hargrove’s hand on his shoulder and his breath instantly got shallower. “So why don’t you all enjoy your thing and let me go.” “No, no… I think we should hear what was so important. You said something when I came in. I think we’d like to hear it.” Eddie rolled his shoulder out of Billy’s grip, but in turn, shifted himself around to realize just how close he’d been. The crowd was silent around them, hanging with baited breath to see if tonight would be the night Eddie the Banished would be beaten in. “Nah. Then I’d have nothing for you next time. For any of you.” The words had an underlying meaning to them. A lifeline cast out to the reluctant host who, thankfully, caught it. Tommy pushed his way through the crowd and in the most ass-kissing manner, suggested that Eddie wasn’t worth the time and there was a keg with Billy’s name on it out in the yard. “Who wants to see Billy Hargrove beat his kegstand record?!” Tommy shouted to which the fickle crowd cheered in reply. Within seconds, the mob had begun to file out the back door, leaving Eddie a chance to slip out the front. Yet as soon as his hand curved around the knob, that same grip clamped around his elbow. Billy had lit a cigarette in that short amount of time and had no qualms about blowing the fumes right into Eddie’s face as he turned to face him. Billy sucked on his teeth. “Next time…should speak louuud and cleaaarrr when you wanna say somethin’...freak. Might offend somebody if you don’t.” The corners of Billy’s mouth twitched with something sinister as he flicked the half-smoked cig over Eddie’s shoulder into the grass. Someone shouted for him from the back door. “Yeah… I’m comin’,” he responded, icy hues not leaving Eddie’s visage despite shoving Eddie’s elbow from his grasp. But the next moment had Billy going to rejoin the court and Eddie shuffling as fast as he could out the front door.


06/20/2022 07:56 PM 

Sample/Starter: Another Earth.

    The welcomed sound of peace outside of her room left a pleasant feeling of peace. A welcome difference to the white room and heavy cleaning air around her room in the hospital. Usually, the hospital would have held her in her room with the others. With all that’s being going on, she knew visitors would come to take a peek at the supposed Shepard from the legend.That was a few years ago from now. The warning rang true when they said it would take time for everything to go back to normal. The mass effect was destroyed from the war and after a few years they got them working; fortunately she wasn’t able to help this time.    Maybe everything is better off that way. The commander mused to herself, slowly sipping her herbal tea with her book in her right hand. No doubt the crew are enjoying their time off. It must be weird to enjoy life without the warning of the reapers around every corner.    After waking up to her earth destroyed, and her suit ruined, she made her way back to the survivors and found some of the people fighting still around trying to move the hurt and rounding up the people who can help rescue the others around London. From there, they found her crew and moved to a planet close by where she could be looked over. This earth wasn’t the earth she knew, but it was a place where humans are living without harm. At least she thought they had it easy.         Astoria rarely left her home to be sure it was just as bad.    The next week after, she was moved into a spare room within the hospital. No one really knew about her, so she stayed in the room for at least a week before her crew came to visit and then commanders and the Council. With news traveling faster with the media, she was moved into a spare apartment in New York city, which was a welcome relief after the news acted up with a while new world within space. Planets, aliens and the relay? It threw everyone for a loop and people are freaking out or trying to get Astoria Shepard to tell them more.    The sound of her mobile phone buzzing forced her thoughts to pause, her green eyes saw Diana Allers’ name flashing on the screen. Astoira closed her eyes and sighed heavily. Now what could she want from me? She thought. For god’s sake, she just gave her a interview a week ago.    If that wasn’t a bad sign of things to come... Artoira didn’t know what was, either way this was one reporter she did in fact understand with her time on her ship. Diana did a lot to support the war effort, so this left her owing her much more than a simple interview, but that was all she wanted from the commander, anyway.    Artoira sat up on her bed and stood up while stretching her arms in the air until a satisfying pop came from her sore muscles. She just recently finished stretching in her room before sitting on her bed. Diana got to her just in time before she went out for her usual run around the street and park if she felt extra eager. The phone rang with ‘My Sexobeat.’ Which forced her to lift it from the table, rolling her eyes skyward while placing the phone to her ear. “Hello, Diana.”    “Shepard! You sound so... Disappointed.” A female voice teased on the other side of the line,”...Let me guess... You finally liked my last meet and greet?”    “No. Nothing like that. Didn’t we just talk?” She asked curiously, shuffling near her bed while slipping on her trainers on before sitting back down on her bed. Leaning down to tie her laces, her face and shoulder holding the phone up.    “Aw.. Well, no harm done!” Diana said quickly, ”I’m sure I can-”     Artoira didn’t bother hearing the end. “No thank you, Diana.” She cut off right away, only to stand up and walk over to her desk in her room. Grabbing a black leather hobo bag on the way, stopping briefly to check the mirror.    On a rare occasion when she was allowed time off, she was a fashion forward person. The problem was getting her out of uniform or her suit to see her dressing casual or anything else. Today she was wearing her black toga top with long sleeves, a Grey cropped sweater was thrown over it. Along with her matching black leggings, it was simple for her, but enough for a simple run down the street and sometimes the park close by.    Artoira ran her hand through her straight shoulder length hair once more, making sure she missed nothing from the moment she woke up. Another thing she hated about being famous, she had to keep a eye on everyone to make sure she wasn’t around a reporter or some cameramen looking to make a quick buck.    “Oh, come on... I was just kidding.”    “...So, was there a point to this call?”    She didn’t mind talking to Diana. Really, but the woman and everyone else thought it was a good idea for her to move on with her life. How do you just... Move on? Most of her body was replaced with robot parts, sure she might grow old and die, eventually... That didn’t mean she was going to end being like everyone else. Not when they saw the legend and not the real Shepard in front of them. She was an excellent reporter, knew how to get the story and stay on someone’s good side. Diana and Artoira are pretty much Friends at this point.    “Right, well, I did try to keep the media away with your stories...”     “...But they want a story from my lips, right?” Artoira smiled slightly, walking down a set of stairs to the bottom floor. Where she walked into her kitchen. Everything was sitting there waiting for her. She just had to fix everything. “I can’t believe they waited as long as they did.” The media she knew back home would have found some way inside.    Diana laughed on the other side, “Right!? But in any case, they want you to come to a party at city hall.” She told her with a sigh, the sound of her pouring something into the cup reached the commander’s ears. “I was hoping you could go and make a speech or something...”    Artoira closed her eyes and leaned on the counter in the kitchen. “Right.” She muttered under her breath, “I guess that couldn’t hurt... “    “Great!” Diana was quick to reply, “No need to write this down. The party is tonight... Sometime around eight, maybe?”    Why did she feel like this was planned from the start? Artoira opened her mouth to reply, but was promptly stopped. “...Oh shoot. I promised to have coffee with another reporter... See you later, Shep!” the reported said before the mobile phone went dead. Leaving a very dumbfound commander staring at the mobile, she pulled away from her ear.    “...And they say I need to take a break?” With a bemused expression, she sat her mobile down and picked up her water bottle from the table before she walked to her sink and poured some water into the bottle. Shepard then moved to her fridge and pulled out a box filled with food for after her run. Walking back, while taking the bottle from the sink. She placed everything in her bag and grabbed her keys from the counter before walking to her front door. Stepping outside, she closed the door before starting off with a slight job down the street.

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