Teagan had to brace herself for impact. She wasn't sure what she was going to be walking into considering the state she'd left in. The need to escape her world was instant that morning she'd woken up. The morning she hopped on a jet and left New York. So much had happened that lead up to her escape. So many things began to haunt her that running away was better than staying and facing the consequences of her actions. She couldn't open up to her father because he didn't know what she'd been up to. She couldn't open up to Cherish, because she was living her life. She was happy and bringing her down after all she'd been through was not something Teagan wanted to be responsible for. In her mind leaving was the only way to insure that everyone was happy. Everyone except her and that was her burden to bare alone.
Hiding out in the hotel wasn't her original plan when returning. She'd planned to head straight for her penthouse, but just walking out of the terminal, being instantly recognized, and forcing herself back to what being home was like. Well it was a lot for anyone to handle, let alone someone who was teetering on an emotional purge.
Pushing the heavy door open it was like stepping into a time machine, her penthouse was exactly how she'd left it. She stepped in dropping her bag at the door as she did a quick survey of the damage before her. There were designer clothes thrown about, hanging from the backs of the couches and chair. Shoes mismatched in different plies on the floor. A rack of dresses she was supposed to choose from for gala but never got around to attending. Swallowing in an attempt to alleviate the pressure on her chest, she entered her bedroom. The bed was unmade, her pillows hanging off the edge as she absentmindedly took a large step over a clean space in the carpet. The spot was clear and to the naked eye she was stepping over nothing, but to her a memory burned into her that she'd never escape.
“ Come on, Blondie. You’re down right?” Rick called out to Teagan. The blonde watched him turn to get his dark eyes on her just as she was about to finish off the champagne flute in her hand. This was never where she saw her life going. Drugs? Sure she’d dabbled in weed, but this wasn't just a silly misdemeanor line she'd crossed, this was addicted ruin your life drugs. This was career suicide, lose everything you've worked for type of drugs, and yet here she was again. However, this time in a more intimate gathering. Fewer people, more party favors, an exclusive guest list, and she was one of the lucky ones.
This wasn’t the first time Teagan had been put in this position. It was a few months prior when the famous blonde had found herself at a celebrity hosted shindig, hanging out in the VIP when she was offered the nose sugar for the first time. Everyone in the room had taken their line like seasoned experts and as it got to her, she glanced around the room at her peers. All eyes on her judging her next move as she went against her better judgment and took the offered line. The experience had been something she could never explain. The way the high hit her was like a confidence boost. She felt like for the first time in a while like everything would be ok. Maybe it was her past couple relationships that didn’t end on good terms. Maybe it was the need to release the what if questions that lingered in the back of her mind. Maybe it was her mother missing every milestone she'd passed in her life. Maybe it was a little bit of everything all rolled into one that had her taking the fork in the road to her placing a rolled up hundred to her nose and inhaling the white powder.
Tonight wasn’t any different. Teagan knew she wanted an escape, rather needed an escape. So much had happened in the recent past that was destroying her slowly, putting her in the position to want to run away from it all, and yet it felt like she was still cemented to the ground. She felt forced to remain there and witness the world moving on without her as the strings of the past held her back. Teagan had burned the letter she’d wrote, knowing it was better to keep the truth to herself than open up the old wounds that would bleed from her plea. It was too late for that now. Delivering the confession would have only lead to heartache and pain for others, that just dealing with it herself was enough. She didn’t want to burden anyone else with these feelings or that weight.
“Teagan, Bring that ass over here. You wanted this.” Rick outstretched his arm as he grabbed a hold of hers, leading her around the couch to the seat next to him, and handed her the small plastic straw. “ C'mon Babe. I don’t wanna party alone." Teagan paused for a moment as the devil and angel on her shouldered battled it out, but quickly the devil won and Teagan placed the straw to her nose and lowered her head inhaling the line of powder. Sniffing hard she threw her head back, feeling her eyes water slightly before pinching her nostrils as she shook off the instant head rush. "That’s a good girl” He coached as his calloused hand came to her leg massaging at her upper thigh.
This wasn’t Teagan’s normal crowd. In fact she’d been avoiding Rick ever since the first time she’d met him. He made her feel dirty in a bad way. He was a little skeevy, a little greasy, almost to the point where your subconscious knew to keep your guard up around him, but on a night like tonight where she needed to forget, he was the best person for the job. She wasn’t thinking about the longing in her heart, she was erasing it and all of those similar memories for the night. “Why does this always feel so good?” Teagan spoke rhetorically even though she hated how much she liked the feeling of euphoria. Teagan hated that she enjoyed the release of all the tension. She knew why people were so easily addicted to the stuff, anyone who tried it could understand.
“One more, babe.” Rick urged as he held the glass plate up to her. She looked into his dark dilated pupils and nodded without hesitation as she took another hit. Her body relaxed as she sunk in against the couch and let the drugs take their effect. He was pushing her to a limit, one she hadn't crossed, but it had been hours of partying, drinking, taking hits, and yet she was still hanging in. Teagan was a different person tonight, no responsibilities, no worries, just fun. Crazy, wild, let your hair down fun. So much fun that she’d let Rick talk her into continuing the party back at her place. She knew he wanted to get her alone and he knew she was just high enough to agree. Maybe that was his goal all night.
“Now the real party can start.” Rick grinned as he eyed the model blond. Easing his larger arms around her skinny frame, he trailed a series of kisses down her neck. He let out a soft groan as his hands roamed her body, seemingly enjoying the taste of her skin. All the while Teagan’s eyes were closed but she was imagining someone else entirely. If thoughts were wishes he'd appear before, but that just wasn't the case.
“Is it hot in here? It's hot in here.” Teagan stated and asked all the same time as she pulled away from her house guest and moved to turn down the air. “I’m feeling claustrophobic. I need to breathe,” she whined as she reached behind her fighting the zipper on her designer dress, practically ripping it from her body. The blonde made her way towards her closet in search of something less constricting.
Rick had followed her like a puppy over to the closet door, resting against the frame as he watched Teagan undress intently. “ Come on babe, don’t put clothes back on, I prefer you this way.” the devilish grin grew wide as he reached for the small shirt in her hand, giving it a tug as he pulled Teagan with it. Stumbling closer she lost her grip on the material as he managed to pull it away before she could cover up her bare chest giving him a look of mild annoyance.
“C'mon Rick.” she whined not into the touchy feely nature that he was exuding. “Set us up another line ok.” pulling any attention she could off of her and onto something else as she snatched the oversized shirt back and slipped it on hastily as it fell just long enough to cover her Victoria's secrets.
Rick did as he was told, moving to her bed and sitting on the edge as set up another set of lines for them both. Quickly inhaling two for himself he set the glass behind him on the bed so that Teagan would have to go through him to get it. “Gotta earn it, babe.” His hands snaked around her ass, holding the curve of her bubble butt, and pulling her between his legs as he leaned in firmly pressing his lips to hers. It wasn’t a kiss of passion, but one of uncomfortable necessity. Teagan returned the kiss to earn her reward only to feel him pull away a few moments later.
The look on his face was that of instant worry as her blue eyes widened watching him slip down the edge of her bed and fall to the floor as his body shook like a fish on dry land. “Rick?.. Rick.?” She tried to lightly tap is face to get his attention as he seized on the ground. His nose started to bleed as he continued to shake, the intracerebral hemorrhage causing the blood to seep from his nostrils that turned into a pool against her carpet. Teagan's breathing labored as she panicked, the drugs clouding her mind, and all she wanted to do was sober up completely.
“Come on, Rick. You’re gonna be ok, You’re gonna be ok.” She continued to chant as if she was trying to console herself. Teagan was so fixated on the task of cleanup she hadn’t even noticed that he’d stopped moving as she soaked up the blood. Minutes that felt like hours had passed as she realized he wasn’t waking up. With a trembling hand Teagan reached forward and placed her two fingers blood stained fingers against his neck. There was no pulse, just a body, a pool of blood, and a terrified Teagan sitting in it.
“What am I going to do? What am I going to do? What am I going to do?…..” He blue hues were fixated on the scene before her as her heart pounded so loudly against her chest she could almost hear it. She was watching everything she had disappear right before her eyes. Her modeling contract, her sponsors, she was headed for jail she was sure of it. There was no coming back from this. She could already read the press clippings. " Model and beauty guru Teagan Trafficante arrested for murder." A tear trickled down her cheek as just the mere thought. She had to do something, she had to call someone. There was only one.
Shaking hands left bloody finger prints on her phone as she hit his number and pressed send. She sat on her white comforter before the realization that she was covered in Rick's blood set in. She looked at the crimson against the cotton and fear flooded her for the second wave as she heard a sleep deep voice answer the phone. " He.. hey. It's me..." Her eyes were instantly blurry, filled with tears as she tried to shakes them off, nervously trying to wipe the blood off her hand by wiping them against her bare thighs. " I..." her voice cracked as she forced the words out. "I need you. Please." Her voice shook giving clear signs she was in distress.
Teagan could hear the shuffling on the other end of the line mentally blocking out the sound of a woman’s voice in the distance from the other end. " Shhh no no, go back to sleep. I'll be back.." She could hear him say but that wasn't her concern. She was in a desperate need for help and he was the only person she could call. Teagan chewed her lip until she heard his voice louder and clearer, obviously having left whomever he was previously talking to for a place where he could talk. "What's going on?"
For a moment she thought about not involving him and telling him never mind and just calling her father. He'd be disappointed definitely, he'd probably look right through her like she wasn't the perfect daughter he'd raised. It was that thought alone that had her repeating her previous words. All she had was her father and she couldn't imagine ever having him look at her as anything but this sweet angel he'd raised on his own. A tear trickled down her cheek as she wiped it away leaving a smear of blood on cheek. " I need you. Can you come over?" Sniffling back her tears at her broken request.
"I'll be there." The voice on the other end stated simply leaving Teagan nodding even though he couldn't see her reaction. [End of Flashback]
She found herself sitting on the edge of the bed as she fell out of the replay. Her blue hues fixated on a small piece of plastic peeking out from under the blanket dangling off the bed. Reaching down she clasped it in her hand, a small bag of white powder, and stared at it intently not even realizing her cheeks were soaked through with tears as they puddled against her skin.