Nine months. That was the last time he had seen Amanda Faye before she disappeared from his life. Forever? He hoped not. There was still moments he would hear his door open and see her smiling face. He would accept her back with open arms no matter what may have caused her to vanish from his life. He wanted to stay positive, but it was so hard. He had pictured a future with Amanda. They had only just moved in together before she was gone. His first love. His soul mate.
But she had been gone for nine months now. He hated it, but it was time to move on. His door was still open for her. Would always be open for her. But he couldn't spend his life moping, grieving for the life that could have been his. Theirs. A future with Amanda was all he had thought about, but now he needed to consider one without her. So he took a month off to find himself. He didn't like what he saw.
There was no longer any life in him. Amanda had been his heart and soul and now she was gone. He had never considered ending his own life over it, that just wasn't his style. He knew he had the strength to stick it out, he just had to find it again. But he needed to work through the man he had become to find the man he had once been. He still had doubts that he would ever be happy again, but he still kept pushing forward.
He had gone to therapy and what he learned from that was to reconnect with friends and family. After Amanda left, he had pushed everyone out of his life. He knew of some who had tried talking to him, but he had ignored them. It was time to change that.