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01/24/2020 09:19 PM 


UNDER CONSTRUCTION, surprise, surpriseI'm going to squeeze St Clair here into other verses outside of A+TFK - comingsoon.


01/24/2020 09:18 PM 


UNDER CONSTRUCTION, surprise, suprise


01/24/2020 07:57 PM 

teen idle.

* / For those who don’t know, as a child, Milan used to compete in pageants. So, this is just a flashback of what she felt back then.▎ “Stand up straight, Milan!”The slap was loud. It had been an open-handed smack and it had left a red welt behind. Just below her eye was a small cut. She staggered backwards, clutching her face, in complete shock.But, she shouldn’t have expected anything less from her mother. It was like she transformed into his monstrous human being when Milan was competing in a pageant. It was do or least for her mother,  and it was like she couldn’t let anything come in between her status and reputation in the world of pageantry, not even her own daughter.Her back was crooned in, shoulders hunched forward, as  her mother roughly shifted her body, bringing her back into a straight and fixed posture.A single tear slid from her warm, chestnut colored eyes, followed by….another one,  and another one until it spilled over like long, flowing water that was escaping a dam. It seemed as if her mother questioned her integrity, her moral principles, strong feeling that she believed in, simply because it wasn’t something that she didn’t particularly agree with. Milan didn’t want to participate in pageants anymore. The entire environment was toxic. It was like she was conforming herself into a image that a panel of judges wanted her to be. At just five years old, it felt as if  she was being put through an immense amount of scrutiny, whether she was told to “stand up straight”  or “project your voice a little louder”, it was like she was being taught that anything she did was wrong. She couldn’t be a kid. She couldn’t make mistakes. She had to be perfect. Nothing more, and nothing less. Mascara sloppily stained her once flawless, matte finish, slowly peeling the layers of makeup off her face until there was nothing left but a shell, an outline of a person. There was a widened wrinkle along the clench line of her mouth, gradually, it moved, as she scrunched up her face.Each time she shed a tear , it was like some sort of rebirth, there was a light, it was a flash of memories, that slowly led her towards the end of the tunnel, but once her vision grew blurry, there was an aura of grey, it was a fog that wouldn’t fade, and it left her in a state of misery because she couldn’t see the end. But, that’s it. There wasn’t an end. it was a void. A dark void. A never ending dark void that consumes each and every aching bone in her body, so she was left feeling nothing. There was nothing to subside her hollow soul that crept in the shadows, that made an attempt to escape reality, because it's emptiness is so consuming it cannot bare to pretend that everything is okay. Nothing was okay! But still, Milan walked around each day,pretending, because she couldn’t  face the truth...the reality. She was…lost. It was like she was a hollow plastic doll with a painted happy face revealing no guilt, sadness, emptiness - emotion.


01/24/2020 02:35 PM 

Owes List

IOUHalston Starter (Jan. 08)Nikki Starter (Jan 22)UOMMilo - Starter (Jan. 06)Crystal - Starter (Jan. 22)UPDATED JAN 23 @ 11.38 PST


01/24/2020 02:16 PM 

Task: Moodboard

One: When it comes to love, Sapphire has had a terrible time of it, going through men and women like anything, not letting anyone get too close, but she hopes that 2020 is the year that someone will break through those walls that she has built up. Two: Sapphire has not been very present in her nephews life, but she is hoping that now she is in Orange County, that that can change and she can get to know him better She loves him more than anything and wants to be a big part of his life Three: As well as being a drug user and a drug dealer, Sapphire has a problem with alcohol and has been on and off the wagon since she was 16. She is hoping that this is the year that she gets clean for good.Four: 2020 is going to be the year that she conquers her fears, heights and love being just two of them. Five: Sapphire has never been good at making friends, especially friends that actually mean anything to her, so she is hoping that this year is going to be different and that she can find friends who become like family; she is already off to a good start. Six: Her biggest hope this year is that her and her sister have the relationship that they've always had. Crystal is her best friend and she hopes that their relationship can only get stronger and be better than ever before. 

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